I try to stay out of the Seattle Weekly vs. Stranger rivalry as much as I can, but this really can’t be overlooked. This is their preview of Thursday’s Ozzfest show:

Ozzfest: Black Sabbath + Judas Priest + Slayer + Dimmu Borgir + Superjoint Ritual + Black Label Society + Lacuna Coil + Every Time I Die + more

The last time we saw Ozzy Osbourne perform, his vocal chords kept giving out, resulting in a reluctance to shoot for the higher notes of his back catalog. But the man still puts on an engaging show filled with plenty of leap-frog jumps, childlike hand claps, and jumping jacks (we are serious!) Aside from Ozzy, however, the only band that seems to be worth a damn on the bill is former Ozzy guitarist Zakk Wylde’s band, Black Label Society (although the Slayer reunion and Lacuna Coil are solid picks too—Ed.). With that in mind, the emergency tent might be more fun to watch than the performers.

This is a gaffe on quite a few levels. For one, Black Sabbath isn’t playing—Ozzy is doing a solo set. Secondly, Judas Priest isn’t playing—but they did play TWO YEARS ago. Thirdly, Slayer not only isn’t playing, they certainly aren’t “reuniting” (they never broke up). However, Slayer will play at Qwest Field on Seattle on July 14.

Dear Weekly music writers: I love a good stoning as much as the next metalhead, but I think it’s time for you to put down the bong. Or at the very least, try checking the festival website before you go to print.