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Archives for 12/17/2006 - 12/23/2006

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Colbert v. Decemberists

posted by on December 23 at 6:55 PM

With the exception of Henry Kissinger’s appearance, I thought the much-hyped “Colbert versus the Decemberists” show the other night was decidedly unfunny (the folks over at Wolf Notes agree with me). When I brought this up at a Christmas party last night, most people seemed to think I was way off-base. I adore Colbert, but the whole thing was so forced and leaden, I wondered if the producers of Almost Live had somehow gotten involved. Watch it and judge for yourself over here.

Friday, December 22, 2006

It’s Brissmas!

posted by on December 22 at 5:13 PM

I’d like to thank Jim Jones once more for contributing to the Christmas music canon.
Image Hosted by
Jones’ “Dipset Christmas Time” might beat out Donny Hathaway’s “This Christmas” and Run-DMC’s “Christmas In Hollis” for my favorite Xmas jumpoff. As an album though, i gotta admit Dipset Xmas is no Christmas on Death Row.

In particular, the title track’s 2nd verse (from newcomer Mel Matrix) gives an oft neglected holidays perspective- that of a Harlem Blood enjoying the finer things in life.

Brissmas time, everybody jolly (where da bottles at?)
feelin’ good, e’ybody wanna polly (what’s good, homie?)
get ya flag on, red rags out (soo-wooo!)
feelin’ good, pull the red Jags out (gettin’ money!)

hit the club, buy the bar out
where the dutches out?
get the jars out (let’s get high, blood!)

and we could one-two step
throw your gang up
what hood you rep (9-Tres!)
and everybody spaz out
get blowed homie til you fuckin’ pass out
it’s Brissmas

Don’t let his natural aversion to the letter ‘C’ perturb you- but I can’t help but have a hearty bowl-full-of-jelly belly laugh at his rechristening Jesus’ birthday ‘Brissmas’…considering the meaning of ‘briss’. Maybe Ol Mel was referring to this.

Martian Teenage Weekend

posted by on December 22 at 4:23 PM

Friday again. Students for a Democratic Society, man.

Roosevelt Franklin lives!

posted by on December 22 at 2:38 PM

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Oh joy! Thanks to a tip from Eli at the Croc, and a link (still active as of a couple hours ago) in the comments section of this awesome WFMU blog post, I finally downloaded a scratchy but complete copy of 1974’s My Name Is Roosevelt Franklin (originally released as The Year of Roosevelt Franklin, 1971), the impossible-to-find LP by the greatest African American Muppet ever. For more info on this joyous record, pick up a copy of Lost In The Grooves. Maybe the Internet is good for something after all…

Attention Seattle Electronic Music Producers

posted by on December 22 at 1:17 PM

For any Seattle producers not on the mailing list where this was orginally posted:

YO Seattle technological music makers,
I am currently accepting audio submissions for a DJ megamix project I’m doing for MassMovement. This mix will contain all (100%) Seattle electronic music. The mix will be compiled in Abelton Live so your songs may be used in part or in whole within this project.
I’m accepting all genres of electronically produced tunes, so feel free to submit as many as you’d like. Email me ( links to your high quality mp3’s, .wav’s or .aiff’s; or you can give me a CD when you see me out.
**The deadline for submissions is January 14th, 2007**
I want to complete this project before February so that I can take copies to give out in New York City when I go there for my gigs. As many of you know it’s been a personal mission of mine to put Seattle on the techno music map and I feel this is a great way to aid in that direction.

Jerry Abstract

Silver Platters to Open New Store

posted by on December 22 at 1:08 PM

Silver Platters, the suburban purveyor of independent record store goodness, just announced that they are opening a new store in the soon-to-be former Tower Records on Lower Queen Anne by Seattle Center.

I was figuring that the local record stores would be jumping at the chance to buy all of Tower’s fixtures and such for their own stores at bargain basement prices, and it looks like Silver Platters took them up on the offer, and also took over their lease. Fabulous! Once again, the idea that the record industry is failing is being put to bed by independent record stores picking up the slack of the loser giants.

Also, the press release states that Silver Platters is going to be trying to hire many of Tower’s former employees. Wonderful! I bet those people thought they were out of a job. Look for the opening party on January 27th, with the store actually becoming open for shopping around January 20th.

Annie Wagner protests this, but I now proclaim Seattle to be devoid of shitty national corporate record stores! (Annie says that Cellophane Square is owned by a corporation from Portland and I say they are shitty, but a local corporate record store counts as local to me. Everyday Music and Easy Street are also owned by locally based corporations.)

How Did I Never Notice This?

posted by on December 22 at 12:00 PM

Two of the most influencial and accomplished men in punk rock history died on this day. Minutemen leader D. Boon died in a van accident on December 22, 1985, while Clash frontman Joe Strummer died from an apparent heart attack on the same day in 2002. In their honor:

“Political Song For Michael Jackson to Sing”

“Know Your Rights”

Thanks to Cheryl Waters and Billy Perry for pointing that out to me!

Sorry to Clog Lineout

posted by on December 22 at 10:14 AM

I’m sure sometime today, someone else will make a post. But I just noticed this on the calendar of the Tractor.

Sat, Dec. 23
get a free, brand new five-song Christmas CD with a donation to the Ballard Food Bank

Baby Gramps! Baby Gramps is a really creepy old man who makes amazing weird stompy blues music. All I can remember about the last time I saw him, at Neumos, is that I thought it was awesome, and that he carried all of his merch in a smelly old suitcase. I was selling merch or something, and he asked me to sell his for him, and when I actually sold a couple of CDs he was super amazed that anyone would want to buy his music.

WHICH IS BULLSHIT! Because he’s super weird and you should all go see him.

My Natural Shuffle Patterns

posted by on December 22 at 9:48 AM

Every day, I wake up with a song in my head.

I don’t listen to music in the shower or while I’m getting ready because there are other people sleeping in my apartment who would be awakened by such activity. Despite this, I arrive at the office every morning humming a fully formed song, usually a song I haven’t listened to in days, if not years. Some recent choices of my subconscious include, “I Wanna Sex You Up,” by Color Me Badd, “Juicy” by the Notorious B.I.G., “You Can Call Me Al” by Paul Simon, and “Stereo” by Pavement. Usually, the songs are not related to my dreams, which I almost always remember in their entirety.

As you can see, I have a fairly good relationship with my subconscious.

Today’s choice:

Any psychologists want to weigh in?

The Benefits of the Job

posted by on December 22 at 9:36 AM

In my myspace inbox this morning:

HEEEEEY!!!!!!I was just checking out your profile. I wanted to let you know that my band [name redacted] is playing a show @ the Showbox in Seattle, do you knw [sic] where that is???

You should come out and rock out with us, its ALL AGES. Bring a few people, it is going to be sweet! We are always looking for cute girls to come out and hang out with :)

YEAAAAAAHHHH! Using Myspace to get fans for your band! Way to read CNN this morning!

This is totally how the Arctic Monkeys got big. Not to mention Lily Allen.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

The Verbose Freaks in Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head

posted by on December 21 at 4:54 PM


Intrigued by the fact their MySpace page claimed that they are currently pondering “an extensive list of potential titles” for their forthcoming record, I asked the kids in Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head what specifically was on the docket. They responded with this list, which is, in fact, quite extensive:

Holding Hands in the Shower
Linda Chiffon’s Birthday Party
Everyone’s Fancy
It’s East to Impress Your Grandparents with Technology
Yogurt Barn
Mouth Full of Bones
Small Children
Organ Harvest
Pack My Sack Lunch
Soft Nights
Hella Moist
I Take It Black
Girl Feelings
What Do Your Hands Smell Like?
Soft, Yet Firm
A Farewell to Legs
Wigs for Jaguars
My Parents
The Men of Ancient Africa
Feeling Jazzy

My favorite, hands down, is It’s East to Impress Your Grandparents with Technology. Big thumbs down on Japanties and Yogurt Barn, however.

Steering the Children In the Right Direction

posted by on December 21 at 2:18 PM

A friend asked me for some musical recommendations for his 13 and 16 year old San Jose cousins. They’re skaters and list Avenged Sevenfold as their favorite band, which my friend describes as “some of the worst music I’ve ever heard… but I can see the appeal, it’s fast, loud, and angry.” This gift-giving season he’s looking to broaden their musical horizons a bit and to get some electronic and hip hop in front of them along with pointing them in some different directions in rock. He’s already thinking of some skate DVDs with really good soundtracks, but he’s looking to supplement with some albums. So far he’s considering:

Radiohead - OK Computer
Interpol - Turn on the Bright Lights
Ministry - Psalm 69
Pink Floyd - Echoes: The Best of Pink Floyd
Boards of Canada - Music Has the Right to Children
Nine Inch Nails - Downward Spiral
DJ Krush - Stepping Stones: The Self-Remixed Best
Aphex Twin - Richard D. James album
Pixies - Doolittle
Underworld - Second Toughest in Infants
Tool - 10,000 Days (not Aenima… too many overt drug references, their parents would kill me)

I recommended:
Blood Brothers - Crimes
Chemical Brothers - Dig Your Own Hole
Mclusky - Mclusky Do Dallas
The Thermals - More Parts Per Million
NWA - Straight Outta Compton
Atari Teenage Riot - Burn, Berlin, Burn
Public Enemy- It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back
Some sort of drum and bass - drew a blank as to something specific

What would you recommend to the youth of America, or more specifically, for my friend’s cousins?

Benefit show for Kate Fleming

posted by on December 21 at 1:36 PM

Tragically, Kate Fleming drowned in her basement last week, when the room was suddenly filled with a rush of water during the storm.

In an effort to help her family with the costs of the funeral service, her friend Burke Thomas (of Pris and Vendetta Red fame) has put together a benefit show at El Corazon tomorrow night with Speaker Speaker, Patience Please, Megaspien, and In the Empty City.

It’s an all-ages show, it costs $7 at the door, and it starts early at 5 pm.

“Kate was an incredibly talented girl in townóvoice talent, actress, producer,” says Thomas. “She had a huge heart.”

All Ages Shows in Trouble. Again.

posted by on December 21 at 12:01 PM

Last night I posted this in Slog, but it was the end of the day and I was in a hurry to get out of the office, so I neglected to also post it here for all you devoted Line Out readers… Anyway, read on. It’s pretty important news that could really affect the all-ages community.

Looks like the liquor board is trying to ban all ages shows once again. According to the newly proposed Nightclub License amendments (which were just announced today), “Persons under twenty-one years of age are not allowed in a nightclub at any time.” Their definition of a nightclub is “a business that is operated primarily for the purpose of providing alcohol which offers live entertainment and promotes its entertainment offerings as it’s primary customer draw.”

Translation? Kids under 21 years old will not be able to attend show at venues that also serve liquor during shows. This will eliminate the possibility of shows at venues like the Showbox, El Corazon, Neumo’s, the Crocodile, Hell’s Kitchen, Chop Suey, etc.

You can learn more information at the Seattle Nightlife & Music Association’s website (

More importantly, though, you can speak up against this new amendment to the liquor laws by emailing the mayor’s office and our State representatives (it’s being submitted to the legislature, which would make it a statewide, not just a King County issue). Also, e-mail the liquor board at

We’re looking into dissecting this bill more thoroughly, as there is a lot of, as the kids would say, whack shit goin’ on.

A copy of the proposed Nightclub License legislation can be viewed in its entirety here. It’s in PDF format, so you’ll need
Acrobat Reader
to read it.

It’s Christmastime in Hollis, Queens

posted by on December 21 at 11:25 AM

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Dropping D.C.

posted by on December 20 at 3:50 PM

A Fox Sports NFL rundown drops a dizzying number of DC punk references in the span of a paragraph:

It’s no surprise that there’s some unrest among the Redskins fans. They put all their eggs in the Joe Gibbs basket, and the faith was not rewarded. I’m sure Daniel Snyder will try to solve the problem by throwing money at more free agents; it’s one of the NFL’s most predictable rites of spring. Which overrated wide receiver will the Redskins embrace this year? I shudder to think. Look at the make-up of this team, and you’ll realize that the Redskins will always be a minor threat unless they can build some depth. There’s really only one word to describe this franchise right now: fugazi. NEXT: at NO

Obviously, someone writing copy over at Fox Sports has a soft spot for the products of DC’s Revolution Summer but it begs the question— how did such a person end up working for FOX? Regardless, see if you can you spot more than nine band references.

Hat tip to my buddy Jay

Rainer Maria Says Goodbye

posted by on December 20 at 12:40 PM

R|M takes a bow at the end of their final Bowery Ballroom show.As mentioned last week I made the trek to NYC to catch Rainer Maria’s last two shows at The Bowery Ballroom (Saturday) and Northsix (Sunday). The performances made a fitting farewell for the band, as their extended sets covered all areas of the band’s discography, with Sunday’s surprising inclusion of “I Love You Too” and “Summer + Longer” from the band’s eponymous debut making for the key difference between the two performances. Both sold out shows featured enthusiastic crowds and constant camera flashes, but the Sunday show skewed a bit younger and was effectively a sing-along as the audience belted out lyrics, competing with Caithlin’s voice.

More, including setlists and multimedia links, after the jump.

Continue reading "Rainer Maria Says Goodbye" »

Kris Kringle’s Demise into Sex, Rock, and Sirloin

posted by on December 20 at 11:03 AM

On Dasher, On Wolfgang, On Perry, and Uppers


In other news:

Santa Claus is now fronting the band Journey. He is also in the middle of a love triangle with Steve Perry and Wolfgang Puck. Yes, Santa - Saint Nick, the jolly old elf, singing for Journey - “Anyway You Want It”Ě, “Don’t Stop Believin’”Ě, and “Who’s Crying Now.”Ě It’s not pretty either, Santa can’t sing for shit. Nor can he handle life as a rock and roll front man. Santa has spiraled, sucked into a life of excess and greed.

The years, the red outfit, and the pressures of having to give gifts to every person on Earth finally got to Santa. Things with Mrs. Claus had been on the rocks forever. Santa needed to escape, to break free and be free. So he went to Maui. That’s where he met the guys from Journey.

When they reformed, for the 7th time, Journey wanted their original front man, Steve Perry, to sing, but he wouldn’t have any part of it. So they forged on without him. During a tour opening for Def Leppard, they went through two replacement singers who both came down with throat ailments. Needing to rest and decide what the band should do next, they retreated to Maui, and met Santa at a film festival there. During an impromptu jam at a poolside cabana, Santa started singing. One thing led to another and next thing you know, Santa was officially fronting Journey, but with more of techno hard core sound.

“It just felt too right,”Ě Santa said. “I know “ėDon’t Stop Believin’ like the back of my hand. I’ve sung enough carols. Techno hard core just comes naturally to me. This is who I really am.”Ě

Deep down, the guys in Journey wanted the original line up back. They weren’t into the techno hard core thing. But they were too desperate and there was too much money to be made. I mean, Santa fronting Journey? Techno? Of course it’s huge.

Continue reading "Kris Kringle's Demise into Sex, Rock, and Sirloin" »

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

So How Was Public Enemy?

posted by on December 19 at 6:51 PM

I’m not seeing anything here or over on the SLOG about the Public Enemy show, but I want to know how it was. Did any of you readers go? Was Chuck D in fine form, still preaching about the impending revolution, or is the group just a shell of its former self? Inquiring minds wanna know.

Gents on the Left

posted by on December 19 at 3:55 PM

Last night’s square dance at the Tractor was a blast, as expected. I’m sorry I don’t have any pictures to post; I was too busy having a fucking great time. It was slightly chaotic and completely silly, with plenty of handclaps and a-hootin’ and a-hollerin’. To explain, once again, why square dancing should not be feared: The caller walks everyone through the steps before each dance and no one knows quite what they’re doing (okay, a few people do, but they’re not jerks about it). This was a completely unselfconscious event. Let’s see, we did the Virginia Reel; Push Pa, Shove Ma; the confusing Texas Star; Bird in the Cage; a couple of waltzes; and plenty of allemandes left and right-hand grands. Disappointingly, there was no dip ‘n’ dive. Maybe next time.

From now on, every second Monday of the month will be square-dance night at the Tractor, featuring the fabulous Seattle string band the Tall Boys and various callers. Hot damn!

Everybody Meet Mr Me Too

posted by on December 19 at 3:24 PM

Boy, things got outta hand there pretty fast, huh? Last time I use the words “fire away” when not specifically quoting Pat Benetar.

Without a doubt, “Wamp Wamp”, “Trill”, and “Ride Around Shinin’” are stellar tracks. Hell Hath No Fury is at least half-full of brilliant productions and bulletproof raps, so why “Mr Me Too”?

By now, the Clipse story is as well known and quotable as Scarface, with probably as many dorm room posters, and maybe even a video game in their future (please). Clipse are the seller, you’re the buyer, and this is all old, pre-Sylvestergate news.

The trap game and the rap game are just different facets of the same gameócapitalism. Whether pushing singles or rocks, Clipse are the producers, everybody else is the consumer. I have no idea how that plays out with crackóI don’t have HBO, for me The Wire is still just an obtuse British magazine about ghostsóbut, with music, the consumer/audience identifies with the producer/artist, imagining themselves onstage, famous. We air-guitar at home or rap over headphone beats on the bus, memorizing and reciting lyrics that we repurpose to illustrate our own lives. And, of course, that’s bullshit. “Ride Around Shinin’” is not about your desk job and its paycheck. “Wamp Wamp” is not about any nightclub I go to. But “Mr Me Too” is about everybody, a resounding parody of the impulse to self-identify with pop music, to love your dealer. And you can’t be the seller, Clipse are the seller. It’s the most self-aware and meta-tastic song I’ve heard in ages, an examination of the fantasy that moves units as much as it is a fantasy about moving keys.

We don’t even need to mention the Neptunes’ productionóbarely-there beats, tambourine flapping in the wind, methadoned pepsi chorus girls, and spellbindingly rudimentary synth hookóbut, there, we did it anyway.

Uh huh. Uh huh.

Chunklet Founder Nominated For a Grammy

posted by on December 19 at 3:01 PM


Unfortunately, I’m not sure if the award for “Best Boxed or Unlimited Packaging” is actually presented during the telecast, so we might not get to see how Henry Owings would behave at such a ceremony. Still, I’m tickled to think that the man behind delightful features like Rock Show Sabotage! and Fuck You and Your Shitty Band! is being recognized by the Recording Academy:


And hell, he deserves it—check out the packaging in question:


Tonight in Music

posted by on December 19 at 11:25 AM

T-Time, Rudy AND The Rhetoric, Dawhud
(Nectar) Local MC T-Time cites Fiona Apple among his influencesóless, I think, a nod to her own dubious rap ability than to her typically eclectically engaging production. Producer Geoff Stanfield laces T-Time’s conversational flow with a dusted, protean funk that is far from contemporary hiphop’s screaming synths or sped up/slowed down vocal chops. The atmospheric warmth of this live instrumentation gives an uncommon intimacy to Time’s breezy observations on his debut set, Got It Right Here; check the kid before his impending move down to L.A. so you can sample the goods. LARRY MIZELL JR.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Tickle Me Emo

posted by on December 18 at 5:30 PM

All I want for Christmas is this:


Props to Mr. Matt Garman for sharing.

New Arcade Fire Track Posted

posted by on December 18 at 5:01 PM


You can now listen to a sneak preview of what is easily one of the most anticipated releases of 2007.

The End

posted by on December 18 at 11:52 AM

Today I finished paying off my student loans and I submitted my first official best of/year end list for Idolator’s Jackin’ Pop poll, all before noon. What I like about Jackin’ Pop is that, because it scans hundreds/thousands of critics’ responses, it’s easier for each individual to list their favorites without worrying about trying to be definitive. I can plug personal faves Islands, or local boys done good Band Of Horses without getting too worked up about whether or not they made “objectively” top 10 albums. In assembling the definitive list from such a great number of sources, it keeps the heat off everyone’s individual, subjective tastes. Here are my picks:

Top Albums:
The Knife - Silent Shout
Islands - Return To The Sea
Girl Talk - Night Ripper
Soulwax - Nite Versions
Ellen Allien & Apparat - Orchestra Of Bubbles
TV On The Radio - Return To Cookie Mountain
Hot Chip - The Warning
Tussle - Telescope Mind
Band Of Horses - Everything All The Time
The Rapture - Pieces Of The People We Love

Top Singles/Tracks:
LCD Soundsystem - 45:33
Justice - Waters Of Nazareth
The Rapture - W.A.Y.U.H.
Hot Chip - Over & Over
The Gossip - Standing In The Way Of Control (Soulwax Nite Version)
Clipse - Mr. Me Too
The Knife - We Share Our Mother’s Health
TV On The Radio - I Was A Lover
Justin Timberlake - Sexyback
Teddybears - Yours To Keep

Top 5 Artists:
The Knife
Girl Talk
The Gossip

Fire away, people. Why are my picks all wrong, and why was the Evergreen State College a waste of money?

Update: I forgot to point readers towards Jace Clayton (aka DJ/Rupture)’s critical beatdown on Top 10 Lists, truly one of the all time Top 10 lists of problems with Top 10 lists (head explodes).