The other night I found myself watching MTV2’s Sucker Free Countdown at a co-worker’s apartment, and can I just say, “Wow!” I’ve lived without cable for years, in a half-hearted attempt to Kill Your Television or something, so my exposure to Viacom’s bounty is limited to friends’ houses or holiday visits with the fam’. (On a similar note, the only time I really listen to commercial radio is when I’m eating at Ballet). I live in an ivory, internet-connected tower of hack journalism and overly academic record reviews, so I occasionally find myself out of touch with the common consumer. But, again, “Wow!”

They do a countdown of popular ringtones, and they play videos that basically look just like the videos they were playing 10 years ago—cars, “vixens,” money, jewelry, starkly beautiful ghettos contrasted with the interiors of limos and private jets, etc. Watching these familiar, super-glossy images flash by, I thought about how awful they must look condensed for Youtube, and how there are really two kinds of videos now: those that aim for the small screen, and those that aim for big-budget spectacle. I wonder, do the small time videos work when blown up to TV proportions? Does the flash of MTV-ready clips translate to the small screen at all?

Take a look:

vs.

or this old classic:

vs.