MP3 Frank And Moon Zappa - Valley Girl
posted by January 14 at 13:26 PMon
It’s 1982. You’re 11 years old. You have a budding homosexual pre-teen angst thing going on. You treasure the weekly countdown of “America’s Top 40” (it is still impossible for me to say that without singing it) with Casey Kasem, as much as air. You can’t wait to see if Blondie makes it to the top (!) or if that hot new track “Whirley Girl” by OXO will break the charts.
Joan Jett’s “I Love Rock ‘N’ Roll” is shooting to the top, and you hope it knocks that bitch Olivia Newton John’s “Physical” right off the top spot. Then you hear,”Debuting this week at #32, here’s a first hit single for Frank Zappa! Featuring his daughter, Moon Unit, speaking like a teenage girl from San Fernando Valley. It’s, like, so bitchen and totally hot! Fer sure! Here’s ‘Valley Girl’.”
And you literally crap your pants. Wow! What is this new language they speak in the trendiest state in America (if not the whole world!)? I was blown away. For the next year, my mother and father had to put up with my bullshit copy cat full on “valley speak” I’d heard in this single. I’m so sorry mom….
By the following week the song had disappeared from the charts, #32 is as high as it got. It was Frank Zappa’s only charting single in America, ever. But it seeped through the culture eventually spawning a movie (starring Nicholas Cage). The soundtrack of which would spawn memorable hits like Modern English’s “Melt With You”, Jukebox (Don’t Put Another Dime) by The Flirts and “He Was Really Saying Something” by Bananarama and Fun Boy 3.
For better or worse, “Valley Girl” is a benchmark in our collective pop culture history, one that to this day affects pre-teens. Listen to any group of young girls talk, and your bound to here the usage of the word “like” in overdrive.
Without further ado, I give you:
PS. Look closeley at that cover, could Moon Unit look any worse? Look at how spotty her teenage face is! Yuck! It’s, like, called an airbrush! So, like, use one! Fer sure! Gag me with a Spoon!