I’m such a control freak that I rarely deploy my iPod’s “shuffle” mode, but when I do, relevations unfold.

Sometimes it’s heaven, with my iPod’s random brain drudging up songs I’d totally forgotten about and love to pieces. (Recent random stunners: the gorgeous “What About Me?” from The Best of Chic Vol. 2, and “What Makes You Happy,” from Liz Phair’s much-maligned Whitechocolatespaceegg.)

Other times, it’s hell, such as this morning’s completely uncalled-for resuscitation of this crime against humanity.

(For those encountering the above linked track for the first time, it comes from a Starbucks corporate meeting, where select members of upper management lip-synched to the track, which was then presented to attendees on CD.)

P.S. to everyone: Please incorporate the phrase “knee deep in the mocha” into your vocabularies, either as an all-purpose euphemism for stress, or a highly particular euphemism for scat play.