Last Night Terrible News about Slats’ Hat
posted by on August 28 at 14:49 PM

Just sent to Last Days from Hot Tipper Jack:
I was standing outside of King Cobra last night around 12:30 when two guys decided it would be hilarious to steal the hat off the head of notable Seattle hipster Slats, who was standing nearby. One of them grabbed it and they took off running. Slats got about ten feet after them but then he dropped his head band, which he had to stop and go back for, and by then the hat-thieves were long gone. Slats and another guy went off looking for them, but to no avail. I wonder if this means future Slats-sightings will be of the hatless variety? Or if he has a hundred more identical hats and “SlatsSuits” back at the “SlatsCave?”
Dear Jack: Thank you for noticing and sharing. I have no answers to your questions.
Dear thief of Slats’ hat: What you have done is morally wrong. Should you want to return the hat, and you should, you may drop it off with no questions asked at The Stranger’s front desk during regular office hours (Mon-Fri 9:30 am-5:30 pm).

This shit's gone too far. At first it was kninda cute but now people are actually fucking with our dude.
Totally. Slats is here for us to enjoy, not to rob.
Who?
Didn't this happen once before?
how I wish I was the one that stole it.
@3: Slats is kind of a mummified hipster, like Sylvester from Ye Olde Curiousity Shoppe, only slightly more animated.
This has happened before. I saw the same thing happen at the Cha Cha a few months ago. Let's all cross our fingers and hope this isn't an emerging trend. Seriously dudes, Slats is a good guy. Try talking to him sometime.
I hope it isn't a trend because I'll slap fire out someone's behind if they pull that stunt in arms length of me. Everyone knows you don't maess with a man's hat!
@7
Shut the fuck up.
Jeff Kirby stole his hat. True story.
I certainly wouldn't put it past Kirby.
Keep talking about him, keep bringing him up- Apparently, he's the perfect image of Seattle! ugh! Maybe we should put him on our flag!
further evidence of this unfortunate emerging trend:
http://lineout.thestranger.com/2008/05/slats_hat
Or maybe instead of returning it to the Stranger, you can find him nodding off on a barstool at the King Cobra, or wandering the halls of Crybaby Studios in a blurry haze, or.... fuck it, this is like picking on a disabled grade school kid.
Any updates on barflys that don’t dress like Perry Farrell on awful?
Seattle has a flag?
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