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Monday, June 14, 2010
Homo / ??!! Dear Elton John...
Posted by Adrian Ryan on Mon, Jun 14, 2010 at 9:30 AM
I despise you. I hate you so much. Every inch of me hates you. My hair hates you. My shoelaces hate you. Yes, you Elton John! You! Hate. I. hate. you. You make my gorge rise.
Don't look so surprised. You are a corpulent, wig-wearing manbag of pompous has-been homo pus. And you are a traitor. Pardon me...a filthy traitor. "Sell-out" is too good for you. My fondest ambition has become to throw a glass of pee in your eyes.
It makes me vomit the way we the, um, "gays" or whatever rally around you and lift your fat ass up like some kind of hero—a great Champion of the Cause! Courageous AIDS-money-giver! Gay-lanthropist! Friend of saucy old dames!
Bite me, you glitter sodden cow.
You waited until, what? You were 150 years old to come out of your rhinestone-studded closet? When you had your schmajlillions of pounds good and socked away, and there was absolutely no danger to you whatsoever because, hey, it was the flippin' 90s and everybody was coming out? There was money in it. And loads of attention! Enough attention to even perhaps renew interest in a sad bag of flatulent flab throwback from 40 years ago like you and let him drag his tragic ego along for a few...more...decades...
Oh, the bravery of you! What an inspiration to us all!
And all that is forgivable I guess. Who cares, really? A lot of weak and stupid and greedy famous people waited until they were safe in their rich midlives to finally capitalize on their sexuality. Whatever.
BUT! But. You played at Rush Limbaugh's wedding. That's right. Rush. Fucking. Pill-popping. Hate-mongering. Propaganda King for the Republican Right. Limbaugh. His FOURTH wedding, thank you very much. The man who has done everything in his power to ensure tha "people like you" (like me, fucker) can NEVER marry. The worst of the worst, the lowest of the low, the craziest of the craziest.
You are a cock-sucking court jester. You are a mockable paid dancing monkey that has spit in the face of gay people everywhere. I have no doubt at this point you would have bowled with Goebbels if there was fifty cents in it. You have made a fool out of all of us.
You're appalling. You disgust me. I hate you, Elton John.
3
Why did Elton John think this was a good idea? Not only is he a cock-sucking court jester, but an incredibly short sighted one.
5
What Adrian said... In the way that Elton John makes me ashamed to be a gay man, you make me proud to be a human.
(Sorry, as far as I know, humanity's all we have in common.)
Well done.
(Sorry, as far as I know, humanity's all we have in common.)
Well done.
6
EJ will do anything, absolutely anything, for anyone who's ever asked him for advice even insincerely about addiction. I'm thinking that's why he did this abominable concert appearance for oxy-crushin' Rush without batting an eye. If you need a whipping boy, go for it, I doubt he'd care, but when it comes to EJ fuckups, really, just take a breath and move on to villains who aren't so inadvertent.
11
So glad everyone is catching up on this - I have hated him since he changed lyrics to that damn candle song more than once!!- Ryan White then Princess Di??? Which one will be next....maybe him!!! He is not just a cocksucker, but he gives toothy head!!! I have wanted to rip that bad weave off his head for years
12
The only way that this would be forgivable -- nay, AWESOME -- would be if EJ donated his fee (doubtlessly massive) to a marriage equality charity.
*sigh* too bad that'll never happen.
*sigh* too bad that'll never happen.
13
The only way that this would be forgivable -- nay, AWESOME -- would be if EJ donated his fee (doubtlessly massive) to a marriage equality charity.
*sigh* too bad that'll never happen.
*sigh* too bad that'll never happen.
15
I've heard Dino Rossi agree with the sentiments expressed below:
Dear Rush Limbaugh,
You hypocritical mother-fucker! Why'd you choose a flamboyantly out cock-smoker to perform as part of your holy nuptials? Yeah, it's your fourth go (nothing says "traditional values" like a pill popping, sex resort frequenting, serial monogamist), but surely you could have engaged someone with better Christian credentials!?! Like Bono, or that White Stripes guy. Or how about Ted Nugent?! "Strangle Hold" sounds perfect for any female willing to lie under your own corpulent self!
I must say not only am I disappointed, but so is God! You can expect nasty doses of rectal and testicular cancer in your near future.
Signed,
Rev. Pat Robertson
Dear Rush Limbaugh,
You hypocritical mother-fucker! Why'd you choose a flamboyantly out cock-smoker to perform as part of your holy nuptials? Yeah, it's your fourth go (nothing says "traditional values" like a pill popping, sex resort frequenting, serial monogamist), but surely you could have engaged someone with better Christian credentials!?! Like Bono, or that White Stripes guy. Or how about Ted Nugent?! "Strangle Hold" sounds perfect for any female willing to lie under your own corpulent self!
I must say not only am I disappointed, but so is God! You can expect nasty doses of rectal and testicular cancer in your near future.
Signed,
Rev. Pat Robertson
18
Waaaaaaaaaah leave Elton alone blubber blubber waaaaaah.
Oh. Sorry. Wrong forum.
What bugs me more about EJ than anything else is that he hasn't cranked out a decent tune in a quarter century or more. As gijo suggested @11, he's in danger of becoming his own candle in the wind.
Huh. Maybe that's all he really needs: to get blown. (out)
Oh. Sorry. Wrong forum.
What bugs me more about EJ than anything else is that he hasn't cranked out a decent tune in a quarter century or more. As gijo suggested @11, he's in danger of becoming his own candle in the wind.
Huh. Maybe that's all he really needs: to get blown. (out)
21
AGREED!!! I'm furious with that man for prostituting himself to Rush and his cronies, and I'm not even gay!
22
hehe. love it.
incidentally, remember when EJ did that duet with Eminem, thereby COMPLETELY CONDONING Eminem's lyrics about, like, stabbing gays and lesbians in the head or whatever? the entire gay world was collectively like, "Eminem can't be that bad! See? He did a duet with Elton John!"
boo.
incidentally, remember when EJ did that duet with Eminem, thereby COMPLETELY CONDONING Eminem's lyrics about, like, stabbing gays and lesbians in the head or whatever? the entire gay world was collectively like, "Eminem can't be that bad! See? He did a duet with Elton John!"
boo.
23
@11 Elton didn't redo Candle for Ryan White. He sang Skyline Pigeon at Ryan's funeral. Candle in the Wind has only two sets of lyrics; the original, and the Princess Diana versions.
I'm a big EJ fan, but I'm not defending this Rush thing.
I'm a big EJ fan, but I'm not defending this Rush thing.
24
I think the best way to deal with A-holes is to take their money from them- and EJ got a lot of money! So really it's a triumph! -Anyway the fat ba$tard bigot is gonna kill himself sooner or later, him being Mr. Heart Attack in waiting so get his money off of him now! When he dies, ge’s just leave it to some other idiot like him.
25
...Not to mention he's going forward with plans to play a gig in Israel this year. Elvis Costello cancelled his 2010 gig there. Frank Black cancelled the Pixies' summer show there.
Elton John? Fat fuckin' chance.
Which kinda goes right along with being "fat fuckin', toupee-wearin', teeth-recapped Elton fuckin' John", imo. I hope he chokes on a canape, backstage.
Elton John? Fat fuckin' chance.
Which kinda goes right along with being "fat fuckin', toupee-wearin', teeth-recapped Elton fuckin' John", imo. I hope he chokes on a canape, backstage.
27
"Bite me, you glitter sodden cow."
I really hope _I_ get a chance to use this AWESOME sentence someday.
I really hope _I_ get a chance to use this AWESOME sentence someday.
28
That was a kiki but you forgot to how Elton John's paid performance in any way supports Rush's agenda. Oh, you mean just being there. Oh, ok. Very strong argument there. If anything I think it makes Rush look foolish and hypocritical to have probably the most famous gay man in the whole world--a married known homosexual, regardless of how old he was when he came out, and possibly one of the most successfull AIDS fundraisers ever ever ever-- perform at his 4th wedding. Take the money and run, Ms. Thing. Give it to the Elton John AIDS Foundation and keep sucking dick.
29
@22! OMF-ing G! that's right! emminem! i'd totally blocked that little episode out! the rage! THE RAGE! AHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
30
This is very similar to why I believe Ray Charles is filthy UNCLE TOM. Touring South Africa during apartheid and singing for Mastuh Reagan.
31
Wow, what a ballsy "think piece". Really going out on a limb here in your alt-weekly by taking a swipe at ol' Reg.
Don't get me wrong, I agree with you. But seriously...his last 25-ish years of songwriting are more of a crime than playing Limbaugh's wedding. Also, see #28's response as far as where that money (Rush's money) went. The guy looks even more like a hypocrite than he did before...championing for family values on his 4th marriage, and paying a huge lump of cash to an avowed homo, who in turn gave the money to an AIDS foundation (not necessarily a purely pro-gay foundation, as far as I know, but still). Eh, Rush gets to brag, Elton gets cash and something to laugh about, and we all get to waste our valuable time on this Earth talking about the foibles of the rich and famous.
Don't get me wrong, I agree with you. But seriously...his last 25-ish years of songwriting are more of a crime than playing Limbaugh's wedding. Also, see #28's response as far as where that money (Rush's money) went. The guy looks even more like a hypocrite than he did before...championing for family values on his 4th marriage, and paying a huge lump of cash to an avowed homo, who in turn gave the money to an AIDS foundation (not necessarily a purely pro-gay foundation, as far as I know, but still). Eh, Rush gets to brag, Elton gets cash and something to laugh about, and we all get to waste our valuable time on this Earth talking about the foibles of the rich and famous.
32
holy crap...you found him!!! you found the one person responsible for the plight of all gay men and women in America. And thankfully, you shamed his ass in public...just as he deserves. Now we (straight and gay alike) can go about living in this wonderful world peacefully. Oh, wait...it's not that easy. He played a piano. He played a piano at a Republican's wedding. He played a piano at a republican's party, not unlike the thousands of times he's played a piano on stage in front of thousands of adoring fans.......some of those adoring fans being republicans...HOLY GOD, DO YOU THINK HE KNEW??? get off your high horse, and write to a politician. Stop waiting for a celebrity to fix everything for you. Elton John put a million dollars in his bank account which he may very well use to further the good in the gay community...what the fuck did you do that day?
33
@ 32, *ahem* : "Bite me, you glitter sodden cow."
get off your own frikkin high hor- um, vibrator and douche.
sorry tjc, had to say it before you.
get off your own frikkin high hor- um, vibrator and douche.
sorry tjc, had to say it before you.
34
You waited until, what? You were 150 years old to come out of your rhinestone-studded closet?
Don't you just detest those "late bloomers" who made it big under the thin veil of heteronormativity (or cisnormativity)? Yeah. This is why I can't take all too seriously a forty-something or fifty-something coming out so late in life. And then they wonder why young queers are a mite bit resentful for having their own voices within the community taken away and/or smothered into silence by the (elton)-johnny-come-latelys. Gosh, why would that be?
35
@31: Elton to queers everywhere: "I don't want to go on with you like that." Incidentally, this was his last serviceable pop single.
36
Telsa, though I'd be the first to agree there's no reason to feel too much sympathy for late closet-comer-outers, it is worth mentioning for accuracy's sake EJ did come out 22 years ago at age 40. He claimed bisexuality (causing eyerolls I am sure) 34 years ago at age 28.
37
@36: Oh, I'm aware of that, gus. I remember knowing this (but knowing knowing what it meant) whilst my family watched all those "Live in Central Park" cablecasts in the early 1980s (along with Beach Boys, Simon & Garfunkel, etc.).
For Elton, it was the constant costume changes and the Donald Duck outfit (wtf). I think I came to associate bisexuality with costumes because of this until I actually understood what bisexuality was. But Elton did a disservice to both bisexual people and gays by being disingenuous about this. For the haters, it only added to the myth that bi people pick a "flavour of the month" and are somehow bad news to monogamy.
So no, Elton was more a hindrance — even then. Also, 40 is not 18 or 14 or 21 or even 30. It's forty.
For Elton, it was the constant costume changes and the Donald Duck outfit (wtf). I think I came to associate bisexuality with costumes because of this until I actually understood what bisexuality was. But Elton did a disservice to both bisexual people and gays by being disingenuous about this. For the haters, it only added to the myth that bi people pick a "flavour of the month" and are somehow bad news to monogamy.
So no, Elton was more a hindrance — even then. Also, 40 is not 18 or 14 or 21 or even 30. It's forty.
38
No, you're right - forty is forty, all too well I know. And the thing is, from what I've read he'd be the first to admit he's been totally fucked up as a role model.
39
Perhaps Rush Limbaugh is gay or bi. Has anyone ever thought of that?
I mean, look at the woman he married. She looks like the most lifelike blow-up doll in the world. He probably poses her in the corner in white slacks and a pink sweater while he has his internet rentboy-stoked orgies.
Maybe EJ is trying to tell us something. Hmm?
Someone saved ma lafe tonight, Sugaa Beaa!
I mean, look at the woman he married. She looks like the most lifelike blow-up doll in the world. He probably poses her in the corner in white slacks and a pink sweater while he has his internet rentboy-stoked orgies.
Maybe EJ is trying to tell us something. Hmm?
Someone saved ma lafe tonight, Sugaa Beaa!
40
He came out as "bi" in the 1970's, which was, to say the least, not the greatest era for homosexuality/bisexuality and showbiz. An extremely high number of "fans" of his refused to even purchase his records or listen to his music after he came out. If I remember correctly, even some radio stations banned his music.
Currently, many people come out as "bi" for many reasons: to soften the blow, simply unsure about themselves, looking for attention, etc. But in Sir Elton's case, I feel it was a move he needed to make (coming out) but couldn't make all of the way because of his career and his lack of experience. He was even a virgin (with women) on his wedding night! Anyone that knew him, knew he was gay, not bi, gay. Much like many of us I feel. The ones who are close to us, who really matter, know who we are. Sometimes we hide that from the rest of the world, sometimes we just don't broadcast it because it's not a big deal.
Adrian, if you were half the man was Elton John was, you would barely be worth to suck my strap-on cock.
Currently, many people come out as "bi" for many reasons: to soften the blow, simply unsure about themselves, looking for attention, etc. But in Sir Elton's case, I feel it was a move he needed to make (coming out) but couldn't make all of the way because of his career and his lack of experience. He was even a virgin (with women) on his wedding night! Anyone that knew him, knew he was gay, not bi, gay. Much like many of us I feel. The ones who are close to us, who really matter, know who we are. Sometimes we hide that from the rest of the world, sometimes we just don't broadcast it because it's not a big deal.
Adrian, if you were half the man was Elton John was, you would barely be worth to suck my strap-on cock.
43
The music is garbage, he looks like the nutty professor (original white version), and he grabbed Eminem's ass at the Grammys while wearing a gigantic shiny pink tuxedo.
44
If there is a correct method and timeline for coming out, heavens-to-betsy please put a memo out! God forbid someone should do it wrong! Or for their own reasons... Or in a time that suits THEIR lives.. I mean, What about US?!?! What about OUR Needs?? Famous people really are here for OUR needs, right? They should live THEIR lives in a way that WE all approve of! That's how it works, right? OH and we get to tell them that they're role models, whether they want to be or not, too.
Adrian, Elton John has lived through shit that your little potty-mouthed naïvete-laden head couldn't fathom, AND he's managed to come out the other side of it. Grow the hell up.
Adrian, Elton John has lived through shit that your little potty-mouthed naïvete-laden head couldn't fathom, AND he's managed to come out the other side of it. Grow the hell up.
46
(1) all the lyrics you know and love the most, that came out of elton's mouth, were penned by bernie taupin, including both versions of candle.
(2) @10, seriously? getting paid is all it takes to justify it? guess no one would get mad at aretha franklin if she sang for a david duke party as long as she brought home some dollars. there is no excuse for him accepting the job. but then, i don't think there is any excuse for log cabin republicans either, so what the freak do i know?
(3) it's easy to chastise and older generation of gays for not coming out until times were better. a lot of young black people think they would never have been slaves, they would have fought back, refused to work. but like eddie murphy once said, "i'm sure the first brother who got off the boat tried that shit." go back to the 50s, 60s, and 70s, and come out. see what happens to you. dude just got his ass kicked by two marines because they THOUGHT the guy winked at them. slow your roll on that tip. it wasn't exactly like elton was donning three piece suits back in the day.
(4) but as for the rest of the criticism - yeah. you're damn skippy. i'm not gay and i heard that shit and was like WTFF? i'd feel the same way if i found out aretha sang for david duke.
(5) all bets are off when people get past 60. they just aren't the same people anymore. either that, or they can't pretend to be who they are not anymore and they reveal themselves truly. anyway, elton has been a cracked priss for years. it's like he is JUST making money now. his music isn't relevant (except on broadway), and the best of his talent is behind him. you tend to lose more and more dignity the closer you are to wearing diapers. i'm not being ageist (i hope). it doesn't apply to everyone. but for the most part, stuff hurts, your senses are dulled, and you're lucky to get to the toilet in time.
so in conclusion - fuck him. let it go. listen to his old stuff or not. it's bernie's words that were the magic for me anyway. i've known that for a long time. i like the way elton sang them, but it has always been bernie. he's the man behind the curtain. the rest is smoke, glitter, and amplification.
More...
(2) @10, seriously? getting paid is all it takes to justify it? guess no one would get mad at aretha franklin if she sang for a david duke party as long as she brought home some dollars. there is no excuse for him accepting the job. but then, i don't think there is any excuse for log cabin republicans either, so what the freak do i know?
(3) it's easy to chastise and older generation of gays for not coming out until times were better. a lot of young black people think they would never have been slaves, they would have fought back, refused to work. but like eddie murphy once said, "i'm sure the first brother who got off the boat tried that shit." go back to the 50s, 60s, and 70s, and come out. see what happens to you. dude just got his ass kicked by two marines because they THOUGHT the guy winked at them. slow your roll on that tip. it wasn't exactly like elton was donning three piece suits back in the day.
(4) but as for the rest of the criticism - yeah. you're damn skippy. i'm not gay and i heard that shit and was like WTFF? i'd feel the same way if i found out aretha sang for david duke.
(5) all bets are off when people get past 60. they just aren't the same people anymore. either that, or they can't pretend to be who they are not anymore and they reveal themselves truly. anyway, elton has been a cracked priss for years. it's like he is JUST making money now. his music isn't relevant (except on broadway), and the best of his talent is behind him. you tend to lose more and more dignity the closer you are to wearing diapers. i'm not being ageist (i hope). it doesn't apply to everyone. but for the most part, stuff hurts, your senses are dulled, and you're lucky to get to the toilet in time.
so in conclusion - fuck him. let it go. listen to his old stuff or not. it's bernie's words that were the magic for me anyway. i've known that for a long time. i like the way elton sang them, but it has always been bernie. he's the man behind the curtain. the rest is smoke, glitter, and amplification.
47
I guess you folks think Ray Charles should have just shut the hell up and taken his check, right?
My God, what a bunch of craven, sniveling, hollowed-out caricatures of human beings this country has become.
A promoter insisted that a date we were about to play be segregated: the blacks upstairs and the whites downstairs.
I told the promoter that I didn't mind segregation, except that he had it backwards. . . After all, I was black and it only made sense to have the black folk close to me. . . Let him sue. I wasn't going to play. And I didn't. And he sued. And I lost.
I guess you folks think Ray Charles should have just shut the hell up and taken his check, right?
My God, what a bunch of craven, sniveling, hollowed-out caricatures of human beings this country has become.
50
And let us not forget the fact that he's friends with that phony ass, egomaniacal, utter piece of shit, media whore, Lady GaGa, the self proclaimed, "QUEEN OF THE GAYS" and made her the godmother to his child. If that isn't the sickest shit...I don't know what is. Two pigs in wigs!
52
I Can't stand him because he is a nasty person. His lyrics about having a wife and kids and his duet with Kiki Dee is all made up hetero stuff. He's really ugly, too. I turn the channel whenever one of his songs comes on the radio.
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