Originally posted at 11:40 am, but moved up because WEEZER RESPONDED! Sort of, scroll down.
How much would you pay to never have to see another album cover that looks like this?
Local dude James Burns has an idea. He wants to see Weezer quit for good and he's willing to raise a large sum of money in order to make it happen. Here's the pitch:
I have never been a fan of this band. I think that they are pretty much horrible, and always have been. Even in the early 90’s.
But this isn’t about me. This is about the Weezer fans. They are our brothers and sisters, our friends, our lovers.
Every year, Rivers Cuomo swears that he’s changed, and that their new album is the best thing that he’s done since “Pinkerton,” and what happens? Another pile of crap like “Beverly Hills” or “I’m Your Daddy.”
This is an abusive relationship, and it needs to stop now.
I am tired of my friends being disappointed year after year.I am tired of endless whimsical cutesy album covers and music videos.
I’m sick of hearing about whatever this terrible (and yes, even if you like the early stuff, you should be able to admit that they are wretched now) excuse for a band is up to these days.
If all 852,000 of you (really?) who bought “Pinkerton” pitch in $12, we will meet our goal.
I beg you, Weezer. Take our money and disappear.
If you want to see this happen, click here to learn how to donate some cash to the cause. (You'll only actually be charged if the campaign does indeed raise $10,000,000.)
Of course, even if $10 million is collected, there's the whole other side of the equation where Weezer has to accept the payout and call it quits. Somehow, I don't see Rivers taking the bait. But you never know! The dude is weird. Maybe he'd surprise us all.
After the internet exploded with the news, I asked James some questions about the project. Like, "Are you serious?" See the Q&A after the jump.
First off, are you serious?
I would be lying if there weren't any lulz involved, but yes. I would like to see Weezer break up, and I am absolutely willing to do the leg work to collect the money to make that happen.
How did this idea come about?
Chris Rasmussen, Dan Mohr, and I were splitting a pitcher at the Tin Hat last night, and this idea came up. It was partially inspired by Tim Midgett's recent campaign to pay off Electrical Audio's mortgage, partially by an issue of Chunklet where they offer bands varying amounts of money to break up, and partially by the fact that Weezer are everywhere 15 years after they've been musically relevant, whether you try to avoid them or not.
Other 90's one-hit wonders like Sponge, Dynamite Hack, or Better Than Ezra don't get posts on Line Out or Pitchfork or Punknews or whatever every time they use the can, so why Weezer? If I'm going to be really real, this is a roundabout effort to figure out why the media is still interested in this band despite them not releasing a decent album in over a decade (or I would say, ever.) Instead I'm bombarded with their zany new album cover and crappy new signal every year on the internet. At this point, they're kinda like the Insane Clown Posse, but with guitars and Buddy Holly glasses.
Many of my friends keep getting their hopes that their new album is going to be their big return to form. I'm tired of it. Even my girlfriend, the world's biggest Weezer apologist, concedes that they should have packed it in after side one of The Green Album.
So why do we still care what Weezer does? Why do I know the names of their best albums and last several singles when I don't even like them? The answer is that everybody, including me, needs to shut the fuck up about Weezer and let them die on the vine. That would be just as effective as raising $10 million.
Let's say you do raise the $10 mill. How do you plan on approaching the band with it?
They know where to find me. I'm sure I could figure out where to find them.
How long are you willing to keep this going?
As long as it takes for me to raise $10 mil.
What will you do if they don't take it (because they most certainly will not take it)? Will folks get their money back?
If the band refuses, I will refund everybody's money, minus the 5% that The Point takes.
Whether or not this works, do you have any other bands on your radar that you'd like to stop? We might be able to get a shittier band to shut up for even cheaper, you know.
I would be willing to run to the ATM and pull out $100 of my own money to end Attack Attack!
I saw it was on some Weezer message board. Are you prepared for the wrath of Weezer fans?
I am not afraid of Weezer fans. I can take it. Besides, I'm doing this mostly for them.