1. Do you ever lick your bass?
I don't lick my bass. I'd have to clean my dried up saliva off of it all by myself. I think bass players who lick their basses have assistants for that kind of thing. — Cristina Bautista, Visqueen
2. How do you deal with requests?
Sometimes it’s hard, sometimes they don’t fit. I’m on a track, and I think we’re going in that direction, then somebody wants to hear R Kelly. I think, “What? Well OK, I was serving you oysters and champagne, but you want fishsticks. Fuck. Now what am I gonna do?” — Riz Rollins, KEXP
3. What is the perfect Spurm romantic Valentines scene?
Tight pants. Big boners. Pretty girls. And bales of hay. Plus food, steak, and Mary Jane. And horror movies. And red wine. — Gary Smith, Spurm, Partman Parthorse
4. You've been to fifteen straight Burning Mans.
Seventeen. — Sean Wood, The Spits
5. What's the worst question a music writer has ever asked you?
Someone asked me, “If you couldn’t make music, what would you do?” I said, “I’d be a cook.” And they said, “Ok, if you couldn’t cook what would you do?” And at that point, I was like, OK, this isn’t working. — Jimmy Shaw, Metric
6. If you were about to be mauled by a water buffalo, what would you do?
We would look it in the eye and tell it that it's beautiful. Then it would maul us passionately. — Tea Cozies
7. What's your least favorite thing about touring again?
The nervous pee before I go onstage that never delivers its promise. — Eugene Kelly, the Vaselines
8. Cyndi Lauper?
No. I did like her hair though. She had that wrestler Captain Lou Albano in her video. Totally hot. That guy had rubber bands on his face. — Troy Nelson, the Young Evils, Black Daisy, KEXP
9. How did you know it was a baby's grave?
It didn’t have a name. It just said BABY. And there was a picture of lamb. It needed a taste of blood, and Neil offered it some. - J. Byrum, Black Breath
10. What do you think of math?
Math is the worst subject ever made in the history of mankind. I have no patience with that kind of stuff, but we all have to get it done someday. You have to know math to buy stuff, basically. Right now I’m working on geometry and fractions. I’m a little behind in math. — Marshall Verdoes, Mt. St. Helens Vietnam Band
11. What do you think about that Jesus statue that just got struck by lightning?
Zeus 1, Jesus 0 — Shawn Kock, the Absolute Monarchs
12. Talk shredding. Do you think about flying when you solo?
When I close my eyes, I think about floating through space. — Thomas Hunter, Kay Kay and His Weathered Underground, Wild Orchid Children
13. You're telling me not once, have you ever exploded a small animal or insect with a firecracker?
What’s your deal with cockroaches? — Glen Messner, Bon Jovi Pyrotechnic Officer
14. The Bluetooth Truckasauras Dildo Outreach Program. This must be humbling for you all.
Definitely humbling. Look for them. Great Christmas presents. - Ryan Trudell, Truckasauras
15. I'm going to sign up for your class. Are you hard on your students? I want you to flog me.
I'm strict, yeah, but I'm not unnecessarily hard. I won't flog you. — Dave 1, Chromeo
16. You have another skill set: gambling. Specifically, roulette. What's your process?
Well, 31 is definitely the number you want to play. You also want to play the numbers that make up your birthday. It's guaranteed to win you at least your rent. — DV One
17. Is it true that during one of your sets at HG Lodge's ‘Say OK’, a woman got pregnant on the dance floor without having sex?
Actually, it was a dude who got pregnant. We think it was because he chugged two Red Bull and vodkas and stood too close to the speaker. — Astronomar, Filejerks
18. If God played a trick on you and you woke up one day as a member of the boy band *NSYNC during their prime, what would you do?
I'd purchase every single 1984—1987 Generation 1 Transformers toy in perfect, factory-fresh condition I could find. — Ben Harwood, Hobosexual
19. What would you say to people who want to slap the youngest Hanson, the cute one?
I wouldn't slap Zac. He's built like a linebacker and could probably kick the ass of a dozen of your average Pitchfork-eating hipsters. — John Goodmanson
20. Tell me a DJ competition story.
One time at band camp I put a flute in my anus, no, just kidding. One time at a rave I was DJ'ing and I had a friend light me on fire in front of 2,000 ravers. — Scratchmaster Joe
21. Have you ever actually juggled fire?
I just changed a car battery. That and a few kitchen accidents are about as close as I get to that. — Steve Fisk
22. How do you speed eat?
My process is really just to stuff my face. Try and add some comedy in between, up the theatrics to make it look like more of a process. Try not to be boring while gorging yourself.— Billy the Fridge
23. Is there a favorite Blonde Redhead piece of gear?
We like MXR distortion. And we couldn't play without our picks from California. They are textured and soft rubber—sounds like condoms! — Kazu Makino, Blonde Redhead
24. When you think back to then, and those Miles Davis Bitches Brew sessions, what memory comes to mind?
I remember taking Miles to the movies to see the Monterey Pop movie because he'd never seen Jimi Hendrix play. In the movie house while watching Jimi, he kept saying, "Damn, damn!!!" — John McGlaughlin
25. How old was she?
I'd say between 21 and 27? Old enough to know better than to grab a bass and try to jam with an out-of-town band. — Mark Gajadhar, Champagne Champagne, Past Lives, Blood Brothers
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