Last Thursday at the Pony I was punched in the face by an actual punker with a red mohawk. It was late into the evening at Lacey Swain's birthday when a pack of Legend Of Billie Jean look-alikes tumbled into the bar from what must have been an Exploited concert. Because it was a birthday party there were a number of balloons about, and as I made my way to the bathroom, a punker was punching one of the balloons near the same level of my head. Soon my head was right next to the balloon and as she drew her fist back we locked eyes and I nodded in approval. She punched me in the lower right jaw hard enough for it to be sore today. Later, Dre Gordon and I slow danced to "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac and when I informed her of my extreme fear of dancing, to which she just said "Shut up."

• Don't party with me, punker.

Otherwise I continue to stay in the South Park basement working on mounds of paintings. I've been listening mostly to the song "Cygnet Committee" by David Bowie on repeat. It's from the 1969 LP Space Oddity, a record that I never really spent much time on in the past. Somehow though, I've come to view this song as the first great David Bowie track, one that seemed to make the leap from "The Laughing Gnome" to everything that came after. Written about Bowie's time at a place called Arts Lab, the 9-plus minute track is a wonderful rejection of hippie ideals, but also has a type of soul selling creepiness. Here's a version of a acetate demo the song originally comes from, called "Lover To The Dawn":

New Seattle-based business alert: Have you ever wondered what you may look like caked up in Juggalo-type face paint? Perhaps you don't want to clog up your pores with Walgreen's brand face goo to find out? FRET NO MORE. Derek Erdman's $19 Portrait Juggalizer takes any old photo and transforms it into a "down with the clown" style look that will have all of the employees of any Ohio Citgo GREEN with envy.

• Travis Ritter: JUGGALIZED

During a visit with my friend from Chicago last week, she informed me that my breath smelled "absolutely atrocious" for most of the day, at the end of the day. A tip to friends: if I have the awful breath, please inform me ASAMFP. I haven't been to the dentist in 10 years, my mouth is like Vietnam in 1971.

• Local artist Carlos Ruiz in admitted drug use shocker!

WONDERFUL EMPLOYEE ALERT: On Saturday night at 7:34pm at the Taco Bell at 2201 4th Ave., I encountered the most friendly Taco Bell employee in my lifetime. Unfortunately my receipt does not have his name, only: DT-CASHIER#6. If said location manager is reading, PLEEZE PROMOTE THIS PERSON ASAP.

This Thursday, Hardly Art's Sarah Moody & Detective Agency's Ulrika Larsson and I will be DJing at Hazelwood at 8pm. You should come! It will be fun!

• The Monticello Hotel in Longview, WA is full of S-N-O-B-S!

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