Sunday in the shower I realized that I haven't washed my washcloth once since I've moved to Seattle. I've been here for eight months now. Technically, it seems like using it is like washing it. After showering I was grumpy for most of the day until Emily and I went to A Piece Of Cake and bought 6 pieces of cake. The best cake was chocolate & apricot, but they were all rather good. The day before I painted in a basement all day while everybody was outside in the sun. Pete came over for a little bit. He, Ruben, Lacey & I shot bottles and cans and ceramic pets with a BB gun while listening to Tres Hombres by ZZ Top. Soon everybody left and I went back into the basement until Lacey & Ruben came home and we watched Coming To America and everybody fell asleep. The day before we were going to go to a Mariners game but the bleachers were sold out. We were already in Georgetown when the Prawn gave us this news, so we hung out in the Radar Records parking lot next to an office supply dumpster. It was full of gigantic cardboard tubes and we sword fought with them and then tried to javelin the giant tubes over power lines. Eventually we went to Alki and ate french fries and played a game where you see a person and their dog and you purposefully say it was the wrong kind of dog. If it was a papillon then we'd say, "Oh, that's a nice Schnauzer." It made people really mad. Later we went to the drive-in movie theater in Auburn where everything was perfect. Everybody who worked there was very friendly. We watched Bridesmaids which was so very funny. Then we watched 3/4 of Fast Five which was perfectly awful. The night before that we went to the VERA Project to see Seapony. I ate a Deluxe from Dick's. There was a pinball convention going on next door, Ruben & Sasha went in a played pinball games. When confronted about who they were there with, they simply answered that they were "with Bob." They weren't supposed to be there because it didn't open for another day. Seapony was very good and Luke Burbank was there because the drummer is his cousin. The VERA Project is a nice place to see shows and it is like a cave. On the way back to the car we noticed there were pinball convention magnets on the moving trucks used to load the pinball machines into the pinball convention. I took two of them and put them on my car. I feel terrible about this, but now on the freeway people give me thumbs up, like I am doing something good. I'd imagine at the pinball convention there is one jerk guy who has all of the good pinball stuff and he is kind of mean to all of the other pinball people. He talks down to them and they kind of take it because he has the best stuff. The day before that I went to Poppy with Suzie. We talked and ate and drank nice things. The day before Emily & I had a bonfire and Golden Gardens. After that we went to Captain Black's to see Cherry Canoe. We drank too much. Here's a bunch of mean things that people have said about me on the Internet, after the chop.

• "Highest caffeine content allowed by law!"

"What really irks me is that the Reader is using the artwork of non-artist Derek Erdman, who somehow manages to lose the semblance of the face WHILE tracing it. Is it possible that an incompetent caricature, which depends on skin coloring for lack of accurately portrayed facial features is part of what made made people so mad...without even knowing it? Bad art makes me angry (obviously) on a very subconscious level...So many capable artists in this town, such a shame..." Karlis Kandero

• "HAS NERVE TO DRAW SELF" - 06/05/2011

"You know you really aren't that funny right? Stick to the paintings, they are pretty good. But your comedy sucks." Michael Allen

"Bad art and the artists that make bad art tend to piss me off. When I came across Derek Erdman's paintings I couldn't not comment. In my original I post I said the following: "Not all painters are great" and then I provided a link to his paintings. I should have been more unpleasant." - Fair White Frogman, 02/18/2007

• "So, in a way, I'm retired as well."

DEREK ERDMAN RUINED MY LIFE DOT TUMBLR DOT COM.

"The whole concept makes me Grimace." - Stretch65, 05/30/2011

• Stormin' Gorman, Stormin' Gorman, Stormin' Gorman

"Not that I can draw any better (I'm really bad at drawing and painting)...but that is horrible." - leather_girl 07/29/2009

• "As a child, Kaczynski had a fear of people and buildings, and played beside other children rather than interacting with them."

"My sense of what happened is that, for whatever reason, Derek Erdman decided to not approach me directly and instead - like a child who asks his dad to do something he himself doesn’t feel capable of doing." - Dan Rybicky, 12/15/2008

Stay kool, Kaperers! We're all (not) in this together!