If this seems invasive, remember that our subject co-starred in a television series in which all she did was stumble around and yell at people.
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  • If this seems invasive, remember that our subject co-starred in a television series in which all she did was stumble around and yell at people.
Whitney Houston is tragically dead, and I'm not here to guess at what killed her (drink/drugs/drowning/combo platter?) I'm here to guess at what drove her toward the things that killed her, and if this seems invasive and of dubious morality, remember that our subject co-starred in a television series in which all she did was stumble around and yell at people. (Two wrongs don't make a right, but it's a good start.)

Whitney Houston Destruction Myth #1: She lived her life as a deeply religious closeted lesbian. Rumors about Houston and her ever-present best friend Robyn Crawford date back to the earliest '90s, and proponents of this myth posit a timeline that has Houston seeking to squash the rumors that were torturing her mother and jeopardizing her career by marrying Bobby Brown in 1992. Mythmakers contend that the mindfucking heartbreak of leaving the love of her life for a sham marriage inspired Whitney to become a serious user of the things that would eventually lead to her death.

Whitney Houston Destruction Myth #2: She was a deeply religious African-American woman who allowed herself to be shaped into the the peppy pop doll the world fell in love with via "How Will I Know?" and "I Wanna Dance with Somebody." After years spent playing this "Black Barbie" role, Houston was fed up with "the burden of perfection" and ready to rebel, and had a vast fortune with which to fuel her rebellion. This myth basically casts the whole second half of Houston's life, from her marriage to Bobby Brown on, as one long (perhaps subconscious) fuck you to anyone who bought the Whitney Houston Doll image of the '80s.

Whitney Houston Destruction Myth #3: Like everyone else on earth, Whitney Houston was complicated. Also, partying is fun, Whitney Houston liked to party, and she had the means to make it a second career.

To conclude this cavalcade of wrongness, a poll.