On this day in Bedfordshire, England in 1959, Downtown Julie Brown was forced onto the planet Earth. Her father was Jamaican and her mother was named Doreen. Downtown's father was in the Royal Air Force, so she spent a lot of time around air force bases and moved to different cities in England that have air force bases. Eventually, Downtown got really into disco dancing and eventually won the World Disco Dancing Championship in 1979. Disco TV scouts recruited her to appear on a BBC children's programme called Crackerjack.

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Eventually, Downtown became a presenter on the European MTV-ripoff called Music Box, where she did such a good job that MTV swiped her away and made her the host of their atrocious dance show, Club MTV. The most memorable clip from that show is when she palled around with pro skateboard (and soon to be murderer) Mark Ragowski, who later reported that Downtown repeatedly ignored him and was unfriendly.

Eventually, people realized it was weird to watch people dancing on TV and Club MTV was cancelled in 1992. Downtown got a job at ESPN talking to football players and eventually posed naked for Playboy. Then she married a business man named Martin Schuermann and made a baby called Gianna. In 2011, Downtown unsuccessfully sued the television show Downton Abbey because of their name similarities. That's not true, I just made that up.

Happy birthday, Downton Julie Brown!