The Promise Ring is founded as a side project by Cap'n Jazz singer Davey von Bohlen, a man who has the best lisp in rock and roll. I celebrate my 15th birthday, have hundreds of glow-in-the-dark stars taped to my bedroom ceiling, and listen to MxPx. I don't give a shit about Cap'n Jazz, the Promise Ring, or von Bohlen's lisp.
September 9, 1996:
The Promise Ring release their first full-length record, 30° Everywhere. I listen to it and deem it boring and sappy. I spend the whole winter listening to Weezer's Pinkerton instead, cursing the fact that I don't have a boyfriend. The irony is absolutely lost on me.
October 14, 1997:
The Promise Ring release their second full-length record, Nothing Feels Good, on Jade Tree Records. It's produced by J. Robbins and lauded as the ultimate (pre–Dashboard Confessional) emo record, earning the band national attention. Without even bothering to hear a single minute of a single song, I refuse to give it any attention, claiming I want nothing to do with that crybaby bullshit.
October 13, 1999:
The Promise Ring play RKCNDY with Burning Airlines and Juno. I am obsessed with the band Juno, so I go to the show, but I do not stay for the Promise Ring (and their boring crybaby bullshit).
After releasing their last full-length record, Wood/Water, the Promise Ring break up. I do not care.