"We all know that Christmas is a big commercial racket. It's run by a big Eastern syndicate, you know." —Lucy Van Pelt, A Charlie Brown Christmas

The day after Thanksgiving, the consumer Christmas season kicks off, guns blazing. Attempting to walk down the street to buy a stick of butter and a pumpkin eggnog latte will get your brain inundated with yuletide standards from the trying-to-get-some standard "Baby It's Cold Outside" to Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas Is You." Rumors were circulating that she's trying to make a movie around it, with the writer from High School Musical. Good god. I wish that could happen for Jim Jones's A Dipset Xmas album. While it gets harder and harder with each passing day to reconcile the goonish (GOONIES!) Jones of old (BALLIN'!) with the current, short-haired Vamp Life dude from reality TV (CHRISSY!), before his VH1-sponsored Ed Hardyfication, he was rap's fad-lib king, the patron saint of weed carriers. A terrible Cam'ron associate ternt credible rapper in the Dipset era made me believe in miracles. (Incidentally, A Dipset Xmas is also one of the best documents you'll find of the late Stack Bundles's work.)

OCnotes has whipped up some dusted Xmas cheer with his new Food-$$-Booze-Xmas record, to be found at his Bandcamp. Entirely constructed from Xmas records, OC's Yule log pops and smokes in the hearth much like Otis himself, with jittery drums conjuring images of Christmas family-gathering anxiety. He describes it thus: "Funk. to the highest degree. Shout out to the architects before me, respect to the dons of the future. Im just playin my position. bump. respect."

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