As I said before, I was in the company of my band manager girlfriend so our room turned into a nightmare of a people getting ready for the Grammys and all the fancy parties beforehand. A fashionable New York stylist was hired last minute to run around and pick up swanky clothing for the band and their girlfriends. She pulled borrowed racks of suits and dresses from showrooms and estimated the amount of clothing racks packed in my room to be about $200,000 of stuff.

After literally tripping over piles of Armani suits first thing in the morning, the stylist lady kidnapped me for most of the day to drive around LA with her while she screamed at people about shoe sizes and borrowing diamonds on speaker phone. Crazy Stylist Lady suggested that I wear a nightmare pair of diamond studded stilettos, but I couldn't stop wobbling in them and started to feel juvenile for never having mastered heel balance. I was later calmed after chatting with a girl who informed me that she also walks like Ace Ventura in heels, and that she only bought the Fluvogs she was wearing because one of the reviews was by someone who said that they could walk in them even though they had MS.

We were finally ready for the infamous Clive Davis pre-Grammy party, which had an alarming amount of checkpoints and was packed full of important looking old guys and celebrities.

Important observations about this party:

*Everyone was seated at tables while Clive kept introducing important person after important person for standing ovations. After a while my feet got super tired and I had to stop standing up (I mentioned the wobbly shoe thing.)
*Alice Cooper and Joni Mitchell were at a table nearby. (Everyone knows that I hate to spread rumors, but what if they were dating? That would be the most amazing couple.)
*I decided that me going to these parties is like a non-Catholic going to check out the inner-workings of the Vatican or something.
*A Whitney Houston memorial tribute video played—the one where she performanced all sweaty and amazing with one dangly rhinestone cross earring and her hair was at the height of '90s poofy triangle-head fashion. Her death looms over this event because she was found dead in her hotel room upstairs in the midst of last years party.
* Johnny Depp was sitting with Tim Burton, Miley Cyrus and Wiz Khalifa were killing wine bottles together at the the other end of the room.
*Joni Mitchell kissed me on the cheek because I said something amazing and charming to her in a champagne haze.
* I met the guy who wrote the Boy Meets World theme song. He tipped me off to the fact that he might be doing the new theme song about the show Girl Meets World, the sequel about Cory and Topanga being married! (I've heard the most important, relevant music gossip ever at this party!!)
*Jennifer Hudson played at the end of the night. I texted to ask a friend who she was and was met with total disgust at my ignorance, "Jennifer Hudson was on American Idol then went on to win an Oscar for Dream Girls. Her mom, sister and nephew were murdered in Chicago by her sisters baby daddy. It was so fucking sad. All over the news. Then she lost a bunch of weight and looks amazing. She is an American hero. I love her like l love Beyonce."