by Dave Segal
on Wed, Mar 6, 2013 at 12:07 PM
First, let's acknowledge what a great idea for a column The Onion has conceived in HateSong: "In HateSong, we ask our favorite musicians, writers, comedians, actors, and so forth to expound on the one song they hate most in the world." Can't ever imagine of tiring of this concept. I'm sorry that I'm just now discovering it with this week's edition featuring Robyn Hitchcock. Read the long interview and learn why Christopher Cross' "Arthur's Theme" is so excruciating (not that you needed Hitchcock to realize this, but he does entertainingly outline why it is aural cancer). Side note: It was disappointing to find out that Robyn doesn't like the Soft Boys' "I Wanna Destroy You," one of my favorite songs he's written. Oh, well—I'll get over it.
Obviously, there are so many loathsome tunes in the world, but the one that reliably inspires the most animus in me is Billy Joel's "Big Shot." Joel's entire being makes my skin crawl, and his music just adds another level of bile to my disgust. Musically, "Big Shot" is a destitute person's "Bennie and the Jets" and lyrically it's a noxious gust of seething resentment from a douchebag toward a woman who rightfully scorned him. Joel's hammy tough-guy delivery makes me want to use his fugly mug as speedbag till the end of time.
Woo, that felt good. What is the song that you most hate?