Atlanta heavy-metal band Mastodon have some new merch for their hardcore fans: short shorts with ASSTODON emblazoned on the back of them (butt of course). Call me crotchety, but this sort of merchandise seems like a bum decision from a group of Mastodon's caliber.

Yesterday Third Man Records in Nashville released the new Jack White single by tying flexi-discs to helium balloons and letting them fly over the city.

Envisioned as an experiment exploring non-traditional forms of record distribution and a way to get records in the hands of people who don't visit record shops, the label was sure to use biodegradable latex balloons and all-natural twine in the process. Accompanying the balloons were custom post cards with instructions for the finders to submit photos, discovery location and the date on which the record was found, all of which will be incorporated into a website where fans can access the information. Statistics for similar balloon launches show a recovery rate of approximately 10% so it's quite possible that less than one hundred of the one thousand records launched will ever be discovered and the "Freedom at 21" flexi-disc will surely be a highly sought-after collectible for years to come.

The label is keeping track of where the balloons are landing here. One made it all the way to Huntsville, Alabama!

The Flaming Lips' star-studded Record Store Day release just got a little more weird and/or interesting and/or hazardous. Singer Wayne Coyne plans on including his guest star's blood in a number of the double-vinyl albums:

Said Coyne in a March 27 interview with MTV Hive: “I don’t have everybody’s blood just yet, but I collected quite a few vials of blood and it’s actually sitting in my refrigerator as we speak.”

He added that he plans to make a record with every featured artists and infuse their blood into the vinyl pressing like specimen slides from a laboratory. A limited number, five or six, will be made and likely sold to “interesting rich Flaming Lips people,” Coyne elaborated.

Oh, good. He's doing it for the rich people. Who's blood does he have so far? He won't say:

Of the Lips' collaborators, Coyne confessed that Ke$ha and Bon Iver were his two favorites, but declined to state whose blood he has collected so far. “You don’t really realize how many people are afraid of needles until you say, ‘Hey, I’m going to send someone by the show tonight to get some of your blood,’” Coyne cracked, adding that he was a taken aback since some of the donors sport multiple tattoos.

Yawn.

The Parenthetical Girls already did this, Wayne. And it wasn't just for the 1%.

Well this looks rad:

Feminist Playing Cards is the latest project of Homoground, a music website that promotes visibility for minority musicians. The deck will feature custom illustrations of 52 feminist musicians drawn by 14 feminist artists. Be sure to watch the video to see a few samples of the artists' work. The artists involved are:

Emily Henderson, Andrea Rae Georgas, Ramsey Beyer, Lauren Denitzio, Liz Prince, Marissa Paternoster, Clare Brown, Jacki Sullivan, Brandi Lee, Cristy Road, Ginny Maki, Citizen A, Tressa Patten and Kay Kelley.

The musicians featured in the deck include: Liz Phair, Joan Jett, Beth Ditto, Yoko Ono, Joni Mitchell, Carrie Brownstein, Mia Zapata, Kathleen Hanna, Patti Smith, Joanna Newsom, Exene Cervenka, and many more. See them all (and donate to the project if you'd like) here.

Smartass surf punx Thee Cormans play the Funhouse this Friday with Le Sang Song, and newish local bands Broomsticks and Telemesser. Will they sell it at their merch table? Read more about this show in this week's Up & Coming...

"We made these shirts over 3 years ago and a bunch of 14 year old lesbians got up in arms. We sold out of them and never made them again. The past few most a bunch of folks kept asking for it, so we did a short run of them. Get them while they last." —The Cormans, on theecormans.blogspot.com

Do you have an extra $15,550 burning a hole in your wallet? If so, you may want to put it toward the purchase of the Sex Pistols’ “God Save the Queen” / “No Feelings” 7” on A&M, which is reportedly the most “valuable” record in the world right now. (The single was withdrawn from release and is in mint condition; the seller notes that it was “[o]btained from an ex-industry source with impeccable credentials.” If you say so...) Peruse the details here.

The funny thing is, OG-punk Pistols vocalist Johnny Rotten (aka PiL frontman John Lydon) could totally afford to buy this. But I think he has too much sense to do so. (As do I. Guess my record collection will have to remain not "serious.")

Now available for the pop-punk-loving Christmas fanatic on your list: the Descendents Holiday Sweatshirt!

• http://kingsroadmerch.com/

(Thanks, as always, to SKAlithea for finding and sharing.)

Bonus: There will only 1,000 copies of the book printed. It'll be a collector's item! Order here.

The Flaming Lips and Lightning Bolt captured the retina-rippling vinyl-manufacturing process of their August 2011 split 12" on this Flickr stream. I admit—I slept on this one. But, whoa, these designs are loud and dynamic enough to give me a decent idea what it sounds like.