Line Out Music & the City at Night

Street

Friday, November 22, 2013

The Glory Days Of U.K. Garage

Posted by on Fri, Nov 22, 2013 at 3:24 PM

The Sound Of U.K. Garage
The Streets' Mike Skinner writes for The Guardian:

We are surrounded by the revival of U.K. garage. Young 'uns all over are repurposing the trademark shuffle in clubs and other places they go out to, or stay in at. The old faces have returned to play in new venues, or the old venues with new names. But it's different this time. It's either part of the house scene or mixed in with bass culture. The first time around it was its own world, as these incredible photos by Ewen show. It was a means to an end for a specific set of people: folks wanting a club that didn't get shut down by police. Folks who were bored with drum'n'bass. Then folks who wanted it more like drum'n'bass. And then folks who got the clubs shut down by police.

Middle-class grime journalists always talked about how champagne-lifestyle lyrics were silly and unrealistic, but this is exactly why the crowds were there. Who wants to dance along to the struggle and the shit on a weekend?

Any self-respecting youth culture should become so popular as to be reduced to a few sounds, items of fashion and lingo: the stabs of "R U Sleeping?", the mad Moschino and "Booo!". But the important and exciting thing about Ewen's photos are that they take you back to the real thing, and make sure you don't forget that it was just a roomful of people having a night out, trying to go home with someone – all young people have ever done.

I am a guilty part of the second wave that thought the MCs were more interesting than the DJs, and I feel bad about that now. The problem with MCs is they tend to bring their mates down when they MC, and their mates are always worse than them. Then people do silly stuff.

I don't know of any other music scene that was actually banned by the police, but it's really nice to see them back out again, being appreciated for how important they've been to music.
[Full Story]

Monday, September 2, 2013

Some Street Art From Paris

Posted by on Mon, Sep 2, 2013 at 6:56 PM

PSA9.jpeg
  • GB

PSA4.jpeg

Continue reading »

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Macklemore Sure Has a Lot of Fans

Posted by on Wed, Jul 24, 2013 at 9:32 PM

Broadway is closed down right now for the rumored Macklemore concert on top of Dick's. There are a lot of people milling around, including a ton of people sitting on top of the very tall construction fence around the future light rail station. Cops are everywhere, news choppers are flying around overhead, and TV newsvans are just pulling up. Macklemore isn't anywhere in sight.

Ceci nest pas une concert.
  • Ceci n'est pas une concert.

Its almost as big as the last call line for burgers at Dicks on an ordinary Saturday night!
  • It's almost as big as the last call line for burgers at Dick's on an ordinary Saturday night!

Dicks at dusk.
  • Dick's at dusk.

Everyone was waiting, and then I left. Nothing against Macklemore, but I've got deadlines to keep, and I don't think he'll miss one audience member from that throng of thousands.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

ILLFIGHTYOU Releases Self-Titled Album of Repugnant Raps

Posted by on Thu, Jun 13, 2013 at 1:48 PM

What up Gertrude? Last night at a most indecent hour, Tacoma ruffians ILLFIGHTYOU, comprised of veteran spitter Evergreen One, Khris P (P for "producer" I assume) and UGLYFRANK dropped a tape full of downright ig'nant lyricism and even dirtier beats. The Tac Town crew racks up stacks of vile innuendo, drug induced paranoia, pistol whipping insults, and repugnant raps relaying the things they simply do not give fucks about such as:

fight.jpg
1. Fame
2. Rap
3. Fashion
4. Cops/The Law
5. Your Bitch/Y'all Hoes/Yo Ma
6. Rules
7. School
8. Jesus Christ
9. Checks (cash only)
10. The World
11. Plans

As a matter of fact, for once, it's easiest to talk about what these musicians do care for: Money.

These new-era nihilists daringly assert in our age of infinitely positive (even if forced) twitter take-downs and internet intervention that they will not hesitate to hit a lick on, pistol whip, smack, or otherwise damage a hate—even occasionally causing them to "eat curbs"—in search of the almighty bands, racks, n'stacks while indulging, and imbibing ultra ad nauseam.

Recalling the era of 2 Live Crew Vs The Supreme Court on obscenity charges, I thought it might be fun to note the crews most grating lyrics in a (very) rough count. After lock down and lights out, I settled into a pair of headphones and noted the following: Robbery is mentioned 9 times, Drug Use a whopping 35 times, Sex Acts 13 times, plus 5 Pistol Whips, and at least 20
Threats to Self-mutilate or Cause Harm To Others (casting of the aspersion "Faggot" came in at a restrained 3 times). All this in a 45 minute 32 second 12 track album. I must say: I enjoyed every goddamn second.

What's best about the album is Khris P's exhillirating production work, with microphones set just right, and beats ranging from trap to trip, and the use of such perfect samples as a sub machine gun, and the sound of someone sniffing through straw for beats. The raps never slouch either: full of witty insults you'll want to get this on the phone and slap it in the scraper, because it's going to take time to come up to the speed at which all three of these Tacoma cats rap. I went all mush mouthed trying to keep up on subsequent listens, or maybe it's just that I was laughing at the euphemisms like "herbivores keep the herb fryin", "Columbine yo mama", and my new personal favorite "masturbate to dollas".

You too can download this slew of perfectly executed chopper rap, and show you have A. good taste in local music, or at the very least B. A sense of humor.

Friday, March 29, 2013

Michelle Shocked-gate Update!

Posted by on Fri, Mar 29, 2013 at 12:18 PM

Hey, wondering what Michelle "God Hates Fags" Shocked is up to, now that every venue she was scheduled to play at on her tour canceled her appearance after her insane anti-gay rant? (Full rant audio here!) Well, if last night is any indication: Protest-busking outside the venues where she was originally scheduled to play. With tape on her mouth. NO JOKE. From the AP:

Her show had been cancelled, but that didn't stop alternative folk and rock singer Michelle Shocked from showing up at a Santa Cruz nightclub where she staged a sit-in with tape across her mouth that read "Silenced By Fear"...

Sitting on the ground outside the venue and strumming her guitar, Shocked was largely ignored and refused to speak. She pointed to a sign inviting people to pick up a Sharpie marker and write on the white disposable safety suit she was wearing.

GO LOOK AT THE PICTURE OF HER. Actually, there are three—click through! At least one of those photos competes with Bald Britney for best musician-meltdown photo of all time.

In fact, I think this calls for a poll:

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Conspicuous Metal Dude Spotted Downtown

Posted by on Tue, Mar 26, 2013 at 12:40 PM

Man, I was so thrilled to spot an oasis of radness in the morass of workaday drones during yesterday's rush hour.

Nuke Em All
  • Derek Erdman
  • Nuke 'Em All

If you're unfamiliar, Agent Orange is Sodom's 1989 thrash classic, heavily influenced by band leader Tom Angelripper's fascination with the Vietnam War. Have a listen to the whole thing right here:

Friday, October 26, 2012

Man in Utilikilt Mails 375 Packages. Woman Births Child in Line. Child Suckles, Becomes Adult

Posted by on Fri, Oct 26, 2012 at 12:20 PM

Jesus told the crowd to sit down on the ground. Then he took the seven loaves and the fish. They all ate and were satisfied. The number of those who ate was four thousand. After Jesus had sent the crowd away, he got into the boat and went to the vicinity of Magadan.
  • "Jesus told the crowd to sit down on the ground. Then he took the seven loaves and the fish. They all ate and were satisfied. The number of those who ate was four thousand. After Jesus had sent the crowd away, he got into the boat and went to the vicinity of Magadan."
I was in line behind a slow and gentle lemur of a man in a Utilikilt at the post office yesterday. He was mailing ninety packages, to what must have been secret far away communist countries, because he filled out form after form after specialized form. Everyone loves a good quality kilt/Berkenstock combo, we can admit that. The open kilt flow allows your legs and junk to feel the breeze (so I’ve heard). But this guy was possibly the slowest human being of all time. Each action and movement he made was drawn out and microscopically deliberate. He functioned in a slow motion realm, while the world around him functioned at normal speed. On each form he filled out, he inscribed THE MOTHERFUCKING DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE. The line increasingly grew agitated and flustered. The stickers on his cart said - Remember when air was clean and sex was dirty? And If God had meant us to be nude, we’d have been born that way. And Reading is sexy. I took out my phone, put it on speaker, and played Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger.” No one noticed.

We were in line so long, a woman gave birth. The child grew before us, suckling. It grew into a fully formed adult named Byron. Byron was extremely pissed that the only life he ever knew was a post office line life. Byron grew elderly and feeble, and sadly began to fade. Meanwhile, Utilikilt Man just kept pulling out packages from his hippie cart. From nowhere. It was like the Miracle of the Seven Loaves and Fishes from the Gospels of Mark and Matthew, where Jesus fed five thousand people with just seven loaves of bread and a few small fish. I played “Eye of the Tiger” 112 times. Finally a guy behind me said, “This is ridiculous. Dude, what are you doing? You need your own post office. You can't mail that many packages.” But Utilikilt Man did not respond. He existed only in his communist, molasses, lemur realm of Utililikitia. In that realm, nothing happens, except the protracted mailing of packages. Junk there, begets breezes.

Dear United States Post Office, when it’s the busiest time of day, why do you only staff one person to work the godamn counter? You know when the busy times of the day are. Please plan your staffing better, so that the children birthed in your lines can know a life outside your confines.

Friday, October 5, 2012

Man Blows Himself

Posted by on Fri, Oct 5, 2012 at 1:22 PM

This guy blows and blows his leaf blower. He blows places he’s been blowing for forty five minutes, where there is not leaf within a quarter mile radius. He likes revving his leaf blower engine. I understand, I enjoy revving the occasional power tool as well. But this guy egregiously blows. He blows so much that when he stops, I still hear him blowing. If his blowing were a continent, he’d be Pangea. Then all the sudden, he blew himself. I aimed speakers at him, and cranked Christopher Cross’s “Ride Like the Wind.” Although, his fucking leaf blower was going, so he couldn't hear. I’ve been into the Christopher Cross lately.

Im on the run, no time for sleep, Ive got to ride, ride like the wind, to be free again.
  • T. Moorman
  • "I'm on the run, no time for sleep, I've got to ride, ride like the wind, to be free again."

And Ive got, such a long way to go, to make it to the border of Mexico.
  • T. Moorman
  • "And I've got, such a long way to go, to make it to the border of Mexico."

Continue reading »

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Yogurt Thrown Toward Parking Cop

Posted by on Thu, Sep 20, 2012 at 10:36 AM

ParkCopFace.jpg
  • T. Moorman

A man got out of his truck, walked off, didn’t pay for parking, and was ticketed within three minutes. The parking cop pounced on the illegally parked vehicle like a starving nymphomaniac pouncing on a ham-penis. I’ve been watching this parking cop speed-ticket people for a while. I call him The Butcher, and I had the Darth Vader Theme cued up to play. This guy enjoys ticketing people, seriously. There’s a gleam in his eye. I aimed the speakers at him, stepped on the porch, and read from Shakespeare’s Henry VIII as loudly and gravely as I could. I’ve been waiting for The Butcher to ticket someone within range:

"Tis a cruelty, to load a falling man. You are too thin and bare to hide offences. Read the perfect ways of honour. Nor shall this peace sleep with her; the bird of wonder dies a maiden phoenix." (Then I saw my neighbor Frank was on his porch too, and I said, “Hi Frank.” In a not as ominous voice.)

Parking Cop (looking up): “Is all this for me?”

Me: “Please do not ticket that truck. Please put your ticket thing back in your fanny pack, get back in your segway-car, and give yourself the rest of the year off.” (Vader theme was perfect.)

Parking cop: “Sorry, just doing my job.”

Me: “The guy parked like 30 seconds ago. What if he forgot his medication, and was going to die if he didn’t take it immediately? Are you made of complete evil?”

Parking Cop (in the process of writing the ticket): “Just doing my job. There’s a place on the citation where they can contest it. I’m not evil at all.”

Me: “Yeah, and it takes a full day to contest and go downtown and deal with the hassle. Come on, give the guy a break. I know you’re doing your job, but isn’t there another job you can do? Like harvest ice?”

Continue reading »

Thursday, September 6, 2012

GIRL ARMY!!! Cranks It Up 10 Notches

Posted by on Thu, Sep 6, 2012 at 5:27 PM

This is what's across the street today:

WHAT IS RAPE CULTURE? Rape Jokes. Fear culture. Dinner ≠ Booty. Disney??? Why is the victim on trial? One No is rape. Because it happens & did to me.
  • KELLY O
  • WHAT IS RAPE CULTURE? Rape Jokes. Fear culture. Dinner ≠ Booty. Disney??? Why is the victim on trial? One "No" is rape. Because it happens & did to me.

I thought I had a lot to say about it. I thought I had something insightful to offer, to add to the conversation. Something about solidarity. Something about how it's hard and painful to read a giant wall full of words about rape. Something about how it makes me feel or what it makes me think. Something about how art that makes you uncomfortable, art that makes you confront things, is a good thing. But I guess I don't have much to say; I just want people to see this. This is why I live here. This makes me proud. This conversation is bigger than the poster wall, it's bigger than a blog. Let's keep having it. Thanks, Girl Army. I love coming to work every day and seeing what new madness you're exploding on that wall and around the hood. I like that it makes people uncomfortable. Rape should make you uncomfortable. Thanks to the people who are sharing personal stories on the wall, too. That's intense. Thank you.

What is rape culture? Rape culture is where rape & sexual violence is an accepted & expected norm. It supports violence against us & makes rape seem okay. It tells us its our fault & tells the perpetrators its their nature. Complicity in silence = rape culture. Rape jokes are not funny. How we dress does not mean yes.
  • KELLY O
  • What is rape culture? Rape culture is where rape & sexual violence is an accepted & expected norm. It supports violence against us & makes rape seem okay. It tells us it's our fault & tells the perpetrators it's their nature. Complicity in silence = rape culture. Rape jokes are not funny. How we dress does not mean yes.

No does not mean convince me.
  • KELLY O
  • "No" does not mean "convince me."

More pictures after the jump.

Continue reading »

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Man Literally Parks His Car On Another Car

Posted by on Thu, Aug 30, 2012 at 1:08 PM

CloseParking.jpg
  • T. Moorman

The close parking gets me. This guy parked his car so that it was actually touching the car behind him. He parked like he had just smoked a pound of weed and was driving an amusement park bumper-car. He dinged the maroon car several times, like he was mad at it. I thought for sure the car alarm was going to go off. When he was finished, he got out, looked at what he had done, and then skipped off gleefully, like he was going shopping for bridesmaids dresses.

He walked directly in front of my apartment and I played Kate Nash’s “Dickhead” loudly.

I said to him, “Hey, you know you were dinging the ever-living-shit out of that car behind you when you parked? How high are you? Are you going to leave your information so the owner of that car can get you to pay for a new paint job on the bumper? Cause you murdered it. I’ve got your license plate number.”

The man stopped, turned around, and said nothing. He didn't look up. Then he walked back to his car, started it, and drove off.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Hey Burning Truck, What's on Your iPod?

Posted by on Tue, Aug 28, 2012 at 11:39 AM

Last evening, the sweetest smell of burning plastic wafted into the house. I took a look down 23rd and saw plumes of smoke coming from the Pine Street Substation. I hurried excitedly toward the chem-fog only to find a late model pick-up being extinguished by fire people.

FIRE_CAR.JPG

What's the soundtrack for such a situation? "Hot Cars" by the Angry Samoans? "Jump Into the Fire" by Harry Nilsson? "Streets of Fire" by Bruce Springsteen? What says you, Line Outsters?

Monday, August 27, 2012

Have a Great Day

Posted by on Mon, Aug 27, 2012 at 2:41 PM

Remember this masterpiece? Treat yourself to David Bowie and Mick Jagger's fantastic rendition of "Dancing in the Street"—made back when dancing, jumpsuits, and cocaine actually meant something.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Re: GIRL ARMY!!!!! (Is Back to Kick Poster Giant in the Balls)

Posted by on Wed, Aug 22, 2012 at 4:31 PM

Posts about today's battle in the ongoing war between Poster Giant—a poster company largely regarded as a gorilla-bully—and everybody else in the city are below. Poster Giant routinely wallpapers the building across the street from Stranger HQ with whatever is the going concern: concert ads, car ads, convention ads. They even have a reputation for covering up posters for shows and events that haven't happened yet, which is extraordinarily poor form.

But some people think that Poster Giant, which doesn't pay rent on those walls, nor owns those walls, nor has any kind of legitimate legal claim on those walls, needs a kick in the nuts. Last night, somebody put up a bunch of feminist posters with the words "girl army" scrawled in spray paint. This morning, some dude from PG covered up some of that with some posters for some video game. A few minutes ago, a woman showed up to fuck with PG by spray-painting "OH POSTER GIANT, UP YOURS!" (I'm sure you all get the reference, but here's the song anyway, in case you haven't enjoyed it in awhile.)

The spray-painter identified herself as "Sam—I'm a fucking feminist and have some fucking taste in public fucking space!" That's enough credentials for me.

sam_poster_giant.jpg
  • bk

sam2.jpg
  • bk

What's your next move, PG? If I were you, I'd avoid grandstanding, give the people what they want on 11th Ave, and keep making money while earning social capital.

But I'll be curious to see what you decide to do.

Re: GIRL ARMY!!!!! (Has Already Been Covered Up)

Posted by on Wed, Aug 22, 2012 at 12:11 PM

Last night's work didn't even make it until noon today. Here's a picture of the poster hanger (presumably from Poster Giant, although he packed up his stuff and walked away before I could go outside and ask) photographing the freshly hung posters:

posterwar.jpg

Let's see how long it takes for someone to come and poop (not literally! PLEASE not literally!) on Poster Giant's efforts...

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Who Was That Scorching Funk Trio Playing on a Porch Last Night?

Posted by on Wed, Aug 8, 2012 at 11:42 AM

While biking home from the office last night, I heard an amazing sound emanating from an enclosed porch connected to a building on Denny and Belmont, near the Capitol Hill Half Price Books: It was a complexly funky jam made by a curly-haired bassist, a keyboardist, and a skinny blond drummer who wasn’t Trent Moorman. You guys impressed the hell out of me for the minute or so of your practice that I heard. Who the hell are you and when’s your next gig? Holla in the comments or at dsegal@thestranger.com.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Tow Truck Driver Hits Head, Just a Pyromania

Posted by on Fri, Aug 3, 2012 at 11:55 AM

TowTruck.jpg
  • T. Moorman
TowTruck2.jpg
  • T. Moorman

Numerous sirens converged. Two ambulances, and a full on fire truck. Holy fucking shit, was my building on fire? Something is on fire. This is the thing I’ve never trained for. It got so loud, I thought I was on fire. I started tying bed sheets to the balcony. I yelled down to the firemen when they got there, “Should I fucking jump? I’M ENGULFED IN FLAME.” But they said everything was okay, a tow truck driver just hit his head, and he was going to be fine. There were like twenty EMTs and firemen on the scene. “Are you sure nothing’s on fire? All these sirens, and ambulances. I’m pretty sure I’m engulfed in flame.” He laughed politely, and went back to the conversation he was having, while another guy reached into the tow truck, to jostle with the tow truck driver’s head. I angled speakers out the window and thought about cranking “Karma Police.” But instead, opted for “Rock of Ages” off the timeless Pyromania. The fireman acknowledged, and again laughed politely.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Girl Dangles Legs into the Middle of the Street

Posted by on Fri, Jul 27, 2012 at 11:19 AM

StreetLegs3.jpg
  • T. Moorman

StreetLegs4.jpg
  • T. Moorman

A girl sat on the curb yesterday dangling her legs into the street. It was dangerously close to where a man had earlier gotten out of his Ford Taurus station wagon and urinated. At first, it looked like she was in a stupor, but she was just craning her neck to talk loudly on her cell phone. She flicked her hair boldly, and angled her face into the sun, “Oh, hey Dillon. Ya, I’m just sitting on the corner. I’m so hot I’m dangling mai legs into the middle of the street. I guess I’ll let you take me to Cancun.”

I angled my speakers out the window and cranked ZZ Top’s “Legs.” She didn’t notice. She continued to talk, to Dillon, “Ya, I don’t know if I want a mimosa right now, I’m busy. I’m flicking mai hair, and people are driving bai, and looking at mai legs.”

Then I played the Beatles' “Why Don’t We Do It in the Road." I think she heard. My neighbors heard. Halfway through the song, a Prius drove by taking a right turn and almost ran over her.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Best Street Band Ever Is Back!

Posted by on Sun, Jul 22, 2012 at 12:02 AM

That band I mentioned who were out last night at 10th and Pike are back again tonight and they're still playing right now, or they were when I just walked past. Someone handed me their card, so now I know who they are. She also said they were "products of our fine public school system." They're called the Ten Man Brass Band. They're on the interwebs here. Excellent. You should go say hi!

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