I had an iguana in the 9th grade that I kept in an old department store glass display case with sticks, rocks, and lights. On a school night at 2am, the iguana somehow wedged its claw in an upper corner of the cage between two pieces of glass. It was hanging by its arm and seemed to be uncomfortable. I pressed on one side of the glass to free the iguana, causing my thumb to go through the glass. The glass cut my thumb into the bone, severing some major blood tubes that sent the red stuff shooting all over the place.

I was alone in the house and dizzily walked myself two miles to a hospital. I didn't have insurance, but I feigned confusion about forms and payments while holding a sopping bloody washcloth in my hand. My thumb was stitched up and I was sent on my way two hours later.

It was obvious that I wasn't going to school the next day, so I stayed up the rest of the night watching TV. There was a Sanford & Son marathon happening, and the episode The Blind Mellow Jelly Collection (a.k.a.) The Chameleon had just started. It will be forever etched in my brain.

From what I remember, Fred comes across a bunch of old 78s in a closet. The episode begins with Fred dancing in the living room to "Shake That Thing," which is actually a track by Maxwell Street Market busker Papa Charlie Jackson. Lamont suggests donating the records to a library as a tax write off. After donating the records, Fred learns that they're rather valuable and decides that he wants them back so he can collect the cash. He recruits the help of his friend Bubba, who pretends that he's Blind Mellow Jelly's relative and that he wants the records returned. From which comes Bubba's classic repeated line, "I want my daddy's records."

You'll have to watch the episode to see the laugh-tastic ending.

In the immortal words of Redd Foxx, "You gotta wash your ass."

Disclosure: I work part-time at KCTS 9.

• Photo by Jim Bennett
• Macklemore and Ryan Lewis

On Friday, October 14th, PBS Arts Fall Festival began with a broadcast of Gilbert and Sullivan’s H.M.S. Pinafore from Minneapolis. Tonight, at 9 Pacific Standard Time, the nine-part series continues with Cameron Crowe’s documentary, Pearl Jam 20, followed by Ward Serrill’s mini-documentary, Something in the Water.

Click here for Grant Brissey’s post on Pearl Jam 20.

Produced by KCTS 9 for PAFF, Serrill’s film offers a snapshot of the current Seattle music scene, and includes artists (the Head and the Heart, Shabazz Palaces, Macklemore), DJs (KEXP’s John Richards, Kevin Cole, and Cheryl Waters), and label representatives (Sub Pop’s Megan Jasper and Jonathan Poneman).

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In Britain, advertising companies now feel like the time is right for dubstep to help sell products like Weetabix Chocolate Spoonsize cereal. (Have any Americans who watch television—I don’t; not boasting, just sayin'—noticed this happening here?) As TV spots go, this one’s not bad, and that girl and those teddy bears bust some tight moves. But somewhere in the United Kingdom, El-B and Kode9 are weeping.

Okay, this is a couple days old, but it's just a gem. I would add a Nelson "Ha-ha!" but I think that shit is copyrighted or something. In other news, there's now a job opening for a music person at CNN.

Here is the press release for your reading pleasure.

ADULT SWIM PICKS UP LIVE-ACTION SERIES WITH ODD FUTURE WOLF GANG KILL THEM ALL

LOITER SQUAD TO PREMIERE ON ADULT SWIM IN 2012

Adult Swim announced today it has picked up the live-action series Loiter Squad, a 15 minute live-action show that features sketches, man on the street segments, pranks and music from Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All. The cast, featuring the Los Angeles collective of rappers, artists, and skateboarders, channel their multi-faceted creative talents in this Jackass-style showcase.

This announcement comes on the heels of Tyler, The Creator's "Best New Artist" win at the 2011 Video Music Awards. Creating their own show comes as a natural next step for Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All, whose accomplishments have garnered wide media attention in 2011 and continue to compound on themselves. Singing member Frank Ocean contributed to the new Beyonce album and the collaboration between Kanye West and Jay Z. Tyler, The Creator's Goblin LP has sold more than 100,000 copies and his Yonkers video has been viewed more than 22 million times. Odd Future is on the verge of their first national tour and the release of their Golf Wang book in November will document their travels and hometown exploits.

Loiter Squad is being produced by Dickhouse Entertainment—the Hollywood production partnership of Johnny Knoxville, Jeff Tremaine and Spike Jonze who have been the creative power behind hits including Jackass, Nitro Circus, Rob & Big, Rob Dyrdek's Fantasy Factory, Wild Wonderful Whites of West Virginia, The Birth of Big Air and Wildboyz. The Dickhouse sensibility provides a perfect match for the unique viewpoints, masterful pranking and artistic inclinations of the Odd Future crew. Jeff Tremaine and Adult Swim's Nick Weidenfeld will serve as executive producers.

Never heard of them.

I'm scheduling this post at 4:19 AM because I can't sleep. I really have nothing else to say about it, other than "You're welcome."

h/t: Brian M!

I didn't plan on watching Platinum Hit, Bravo's new songwriting competition show. It's like Top Chef, but people write songs instead of cook food! And it's hosted by Jewel! Zzzzzzzz... But last night my mild curiosity won, and I watched the first 15 minutes of the first episode. It made me want to barf all over myself.

While it was as terrible as the annoying previews made it appear (the cast was predictably split down the middle between the embarrassingly clueless and horrifically egotistical...zzzzzz....), the show featured one especially terrible contestant by the name of Nevin James. Why does Nevin James sing? Direct quote: "I sing for the orphan, I sing for the widow, I sing for people who don't have a voice." WHAT AN ASSHOLE.

Everything Mr. James said made him sound like an idiot college student desperately trying to get into a naive Greenpeace volunteer's pants. Also: He wears a jean jacket WITH THE COLLAR POPPED UP. Again: WHAT AN ASSHOLE.

I watched long enough to hear the songwriters share the "hooks" they wrote for an imaginary song inspired by Los Angeles. One man sang about how it's a city of dreams (ORIGINAL). One woman sang a bit inspired by the eye contact she made with a homeless man earlier that morning (DEEP). Nevin James basically played "Candle in the Wind" and changed the words to be about L.A. (BARF). And that is when I turned off the TV.

If you want to hear Nevin James rip off Elton John 100 different ways, check out his YouTube channel! (You can fight the urge to barf all over yourself, too!)

I vow to never ever watch another minute of Platinum Hit ever again.

Finally some good (non-Rock of Love-related) VH1 programming, am I right, people? The network announced recently that it will be bringing back the wry '90s staple this autumn. This little bit from the show's co-creator Woody Thompson might amuse (or infuriate) you:

“I have sat on the sidelines for the last decade and watched as everyone and the brother has ripped off Pop Up in some way or another with the internet coming out of nowhere and Twitter being hauntingly familiar and all of these devices that are using snarky, pithy text,” said Thompson.

More here.

Grudge Rock is the fun and crazy (and sometimes drunk) game show that combines local rock and roll with Family Feud. Usually it happens once a month at Re-bar, but the show's creator, Jake Stratton, has even bigger plans—he wants to turn Grudge Rock into a regular webcast and maybe even TV show. But he needs your help!

Grudge Rock is not very lucrative—at the end of the night, Jake gives away all the door money to the winning band. So if you want to see Grudge Rock on your computer (or TV!) screen, head over to Grudge Rock's new Kickstarter page to throw Jake and Co. a few bucks so they can make their dreams come true. They're hoping to raise $10,000 by June 30th. Why so much money? Says the Kickstarter page:

First thing, I need to build an honest-to-goodness game show set. The live show is very stripped down, basically an empty stage, a video projector and a tricked-out podium. If I'm going to broadcast this to the world, i'd love to up the production values considerably. I have plans drawn up for a very appropriate set, and once we get the building materials, it won't take long to put together.

Find out more information here, and for further explanation and entertainment, watch this video:

The next Grudge Rock show is June 2nd at Re-bar with Ronald McFondle and Billy the Fridge vs. Noel Austin's Phreaks.

Key Arena at 5:30 am!!!!!!!!!!! Who should win it!!!!???????? Nominate in comment seczzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz