The Stranger, Seattle's Only Newspaper: Line Out: Fashion

What You're Not Wearing: The Eagle Edition!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 20 May 2013 12:30:34 -0700

This singlet:

These breasts:

These tanks:

These sideburns:

These suspenders:

These heels:

These sailboats:

This 'stache:

These headphones:

These jackets:

This Sputnik shirt:

This underwear:

These sex toys:

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NighTraiN Video Premiere at Chop Suey!

Emily Nokes — Thu, 16 May 2013 17:03:16 -0700

Sorry it's already 5pm and I'm just telling you this, but you have a few hours to take a sponge bath and buy Nicole "Ja Ja Juicy" of NighTraiN a birthday gift and get to Chop Suey! The lovely locomotive-punks will be premiering their brand-new video for single "Huntress" tonight, plus Portland band band band And And And and Sun Angle (also from PDX) will be playing.

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What You're Not Wearing: Sexy Lumberjack Edition!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 13 May 2013 12:25:23 -0700

These suspenders:

This fur:

This flannel:

This beard:

This camo:

These hoop earrings:

These socks:

This bear paw:

These matching tattoos:

This chest hair:

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Punk Rock Fashion Shows Are Bullshit!

Kelly O — Tue, 07 May 2013 15:08:43 -0700

Some quotes to laugh at from last night's “Punk: From Chaos To Couture” fashion show at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City.

“Favorite punk song? Um, it’s kind of hard on the spot. Is Goo Goo Dolls considered punk?” —Kimberly Chandler, trophy wife of NY Knicks’ center, Tyson Chandler

Laughables, right here. Red carpet "punk" over here. Madonna and Miley Cyrus seem to be the only people that even tried, and nobody pulled off a Siouxsie.
For shame.

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What You're Not Wearing: Portland Nightlife Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 06 May 2013 10:11:00 -0700

This skull:

These flannels:

This leather jacket:

This sweatshirt:

These overalls:

This makeup:

This tee:

This eye patch:

These glasses:

This singlet:

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Are You a Fag? Are You a Fag With a Guitar?

Kelly O — Wed, 01 May 2013 16:12:42 -0700

Then shirt is for you! See also, this insanely hilarious rock logo shirt, by artist Peggy Noland. Oooh, and this "Lather Daddy" tee. All and more at wackywacko.com. I kinda want one of each.

www.wackywacko.com

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What You're Not Wearing: Portland Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 10:41:58 -0700

This Hawaiian shirt:

This blue dress:

This poncho:

This James Dean shirt:

This sundress:

This leather jacket:

This vintage dress:

This afro:

These plain white tees:

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What You're Not Wearing: Chest Hair Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 11:31:31 -0700

This leather jacket:

These tattoos:

This hairless chest:

This blazer:

This denim:

This atom:

This necklace:

These nipples:

This tie:

This dress:

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What You're Not Wearing: 'Mo-Wave Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 15 Apr 2013 14:39:53 -0700

These shoes:

This beanie:

This coat:

This skirt:

These colors:

This Pac-Man:

This ’stache:

This dress:

This chain:

This tank:

This Cuff tee:

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Purse Thursdayz: Margaret

Radjaw — Thu, 11 Apr 2013 14:31:28 -0700

During my most recent travels, I was fortunate enough to run into my ol' gal pal, Margaret at a local pub. You may know her as the Iron Lady, the longest serving British Prime Minister of the 20th century and only woman to have held that office. To me, she was Margie aka Large n' In-Charge Marge. She was a brilliant woman who thought outside the box and was known for her uncompromising politics and leadership style. She loved Wes Anderson films, playing dominoes, and a good rugby match. Most of our time together was spent photocopying images to make punk-rock style music posters. Sadly, her time came to an end on Monday, suffering from a stroke at the young age of 87. I was lucky enough to look inside her purse before it was too late. Rest in power, sweet Maggie.

G. Smith
Margaret, 87. Leather bag. 10:20am. Zeitgeist Pub, London.

What kind of bag is that?
Oh heavens.. I haven't the slightest idea. It is darling isn't it, darling?

Yes. Fabulous! How long have you had it?
I've had it since 1983. I bought it as a gift for myself after being re-elected for the third time. I don't normally treasure such spoils, but what was a lady to do?

Do you think a purse is important in fashion?
I highly believe a woman has certain powers that a man cannot resist. My handbag is something I can always have in my hands to remind everyone who we are and what we stand for. Being powerful is like being a lady… if you have to tell people you are, you aren’t.

Can we take a look inside?
Well, sure, my dear!

• Pearl earrings
• Green tea bags
• Black tea bags
• Eary Grey tea bags
• Chamomile tea bags
• Mr. Tea bags

You sure do love tea.
Yum! And crumpets!
I hope your purse can provide more than just a good tea bagging.

• Keys
• iPhone 5 with flag case
• Altoids
• Pickled eggs, pickled by Queen Elizabeth II
• Vitamin D
• Pepto Bismol

For the eggs?
Always a must! I'd rather lose my wallet than not have my Pepto.

G. Smith
"I'd rather lose my wallet than not have my Pepto."

• Burberry wallet
• Gucci sunglasses
• USB drive
• Biro ballpoint pen
• Soccer ball pendant

Are you a big fan of football?
On some level, yes. The sport is great for England. I once had an affair with a nice young boy, Davey. He played football all over the world and was revered as one of the greats. I cannot resist an athletic man in short shorts.

• Chapstick
• Sugar cookie
• Kidney pie wrapped in foil
• Buzzcocks keychain
• Yves Saint Laurent elle. le nouveau parfum
• Benefit BAD Gal Lash mascara

It seems you like to smell good and look good.
You do know I was the first woman to distract The Royal Guard.

• Joy Division button
• Pack of Capri Cigarettes
• Princess Diana Zippo
• White bandana
• Tums
• Banana
• Wooden spoon

Why the utensil?
Wooden spoons are great. You can either use them to prepare food. Or, if you can't be bothered with that, just a write a number on it and walk into a pub…

On that note, I must leave this pub. Thank you for your time, Baroness.
Cheerio!

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What You're Not Wearing: Red Hot Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:23:54 -0700

This dress:

This tie:

These tights:

This blouse:

This plaid:

This shirt:

This headband:

This purse:

This rain jacket:

This skirt:

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Purse Thursdayz: Hannah

Radjaw — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 17:29:45 -0700

G. Smith
Hannah, 42. 9:32pm. Hazlewood.

I was happy to see Hannah out at my monthly Ballard gig, The Worst. She had had a few glasses of white wine already and the timing for peeking into her purse was perfect. Hannah has been working in the Seattle music scene for years and is working with SIFF this year doing a "Face the Music" series. Currently, she has been running Hothouse Promotions and has her Seek & Destroy radio show Saturday nights on KEXP. She's got a great show with Lord Dying coming up on April 6th at The Sunset, but before she had a fourth and fifth glass of wine I made her dump her shit on the table next to the DJ booth.

What kind of purse is that?
I don't know... It says it's a Crochet Sak. Seriously, S-A-K, sack.

Where did you get it?
Up at the Goodwill on 65th.

Is it your everyday purse?
Yeah, pretty much. In the summer, I tend to switch it up more for outfits. I'm trying to be better about it. This is a great purse to have because you don't have to worry about someone spilling a drink all over it. The crochet makes it ok!

Let's see what is inside!

• Grey hat
• Leather wallet
• American Spirits
• Notebook

This was so sweet, my grandmother bought me a "reporter notebook" and I keep trying to use it. I opened it up for the Soundgarden show but it was too dark. Once again, had to take notes on the iPhone.

• Random show flyer
• Engraved silver pen
• Horses Cut Shop keychain
• Legal document

G. Smith
"If you caught me when I didn't have a boyfriend..."

What's that for?!?
Let's just say it's a legal document, ok?

• Eye cream
• Checkbook with therapist notes
• Sunglasses
• Taco Time receipt
• Keys with ZZ Top keychain

Billy Gibbons actually gave me that!! I fucking love it.

• Revlon lip gloss
• Doe Bay Fest ear buds
• Beyonce Infallible lip gloss
• Hazlewood receipt
• Tax document
• Accident note

What's that all about? You got in an accident?
This has happened twice to me in the market. One time, I come back and the car was totatled but no note, no nothing. Another time, there was a little tiny scratch and someone left this on my car. It was so sweet there was now way I was going to call insurance. It gave me hope in humanity for once and it is by far my favorite thing in my purse.

• Lip gloss
• Ken's Market receipt
• Shit ton of quarters
• More Beyonce lip gloss

G. Smith
That's one fly ring.

You really love Beyonce, huh? Or is it just the lip gloss?
It's the lip gloss! It's got two coats and actually stays on there. I hate reapplying. Sometimes you need something more natural and sometimes you need that red to just really pop.

• Lip Pencil
• Fly ring
• Tylenol
• USB for Clearwire
• Mace

Megan Tweed bought that for me after we skipped a self defense class. I thought it was so funny! Such a great gift.

I love this ring.
It's amazing isn't it? I wore that for this movie I'm doing with Megan Griffiths that I've been working on. Man, I guess my purse is pretty interesting, but if you had caught me when I didn't have a boyfriend there'd be a lot more shit in here let me tell you.

Well... If that relationship ever ends, which I hope that it does not, I will be sure to follow up.

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Behold, The Hairy Chest Sweater!

Kelly O — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 14:42:19 -0700

Did you know this exists?!? It's true! You can order one right frickin' here. I might need one. I wish I could get one delivered by next Saturday, April 13th, when Big Dipper plays the Mo-Wave Festival. I think it'd look grrrr-reat on me.

Get Mo-Wave 3-day passes, while they last. And do check out the entire festival lineup. It's gonna be a wild ride! And the check out Big Dipper's new
hairiest, bear'iest video after the jump...

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What You're Not Wearing: Gender Bender Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 01 Apr 2013 12:45:51 -0700

This skirt:

These mustaches:

This crown:

This shirt:

This hair:

This vest:

These Easter eggs:

These pearls:

These stockings:

This bra:

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Purse Thursdayz - Rachel

Radjaw — Thu, 28 Mar 2013 13:14:22 -0700

G. Smith
Rachel, 31. Taupe leather purse. 10:03am. Joe Bar.

This morning, like many other mornings, I found myself with a cup of coffee and a magical crepe at one of my favorite hideaways, Joe Bar. With two lovely ladies working the counter, I hoped I could persuade them to stop what they were doing and dump out their bags. Rachel, a volunteer for NW Film Forum, was glad to open up even though she feared it might be kind of boring. I didn't care and tried my best not to hold up the line. Sorry, Ms. Behindme, you're gonna have to wait 5-10 minutes for your cup o' drip because I have important shit to do!

What kind of purse is that?
It's Chocolat Blu from Nordstrom? I got it like two or three years ago.

You use it everyday?
Pretty much... unless I'm biking that day.

Do you love it?
Well, I got it because it can fit my laptop and I needed it for travel. It's pretty cool because it can also be converted into a backpack.

Yeah!?
Yeah, but sadly I don't have those straps on me.

Bummer. What's in there?

• Hobo International brown wallet
• Always maxi pad
• 2 blue pens
• Fingerless gloves
• Sunglasses
• Keychain with USB and multiple Honda keys

Do you have more than one car?
Actually, no! I have had so many people break-in to my car that I now have a different key for each every keyhole on it!

• Moleskin day planner
• iPod shuffle
• Jane Criedale lipstick
• Nordstrom perfume sample
• 5 quarters
• Mardi Gras mark
• Toothbrush

G. Smith
You never know where you might end up.

That's part of my overnight bag.
The mask? Or the toothbrush?
You never know where you might end up.

• Ultra healing moisturizing lotion
• Nanaks lip smoothee
• Glass heart
• Aveda lip stick
• Pink lipstick, logo worn off
• Burt's Bee's tinted lip wax

Seems like lips are important to you.
I never know what my mood is going to be. Do I want color? Do I want moisture? I don't know!

• Stress relief tea bags
• iKlear shammy
• Coupon book
• Lowe's coupon
• Pottery Barn coupon
• Bed Bath & Beyond coupon

Wait! Coupons? Where did you find those?
In the front zipper.
I had no idea those were in there! Weird.

• Green sharpie fine point marker

What? You need a marker?
No, you have a marker in here.
Oh! Really?!?? I do?

Her co-worker chimes in:

G. Smith
AREN'T YOU GOING TO LOOK IN MY BAG??!?!?

Yikes.

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Found at the Fremont Vintage Mall

Anna Minard — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:17:47 -0700

And offered without comment:

ANNA MINARD

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What You're Not Wearing: Black on Black Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 10:23:31 -0700

This Cher tee:

This bow:

This shirt:

This dress:

This coat:

These leggings:

This leather jacket:

This scarf:

This skirt:

These Oreos:

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Purse Thursdayz - Linda

Radjaw — Thu, 21 Mar 2013 15:20:31 -0700

Welcome to Purse Thursdayz! Every week, I'll be looking into the purses, bags, and satchels of some of Seattle's finest women—seeing exactly what they are carrying around all day. Catching purses in their natural environment is very important, so these ladies do not know they are going to be interviewed.
Shall we?

G. Smith
Linda, 55. White leather tote. 12:26pm. Linda's HQ.

This week, I decided to stop by and see my homegirl, Linda Derschang. You may know her from her many endeavors including Linda's, Oddfellows, King's, Smith, Bait Shop (great design) and the forthcoming neighborhood restaurant, Tallulah's. I'm also pretty sure she owns the Shell gas station, Cal Anderson park, and Bruce Lee's soul. Whatever she is up to, she continues to kill the game. I had to know what she carries around all day.

What kind of purse?
It's Marni. Two months ago, I bought it at the outlet mall outside of Palm Springs. (whispering) I actually bought two.. it was a two for one.

Do you love it?
I do, I really do. I love that nobody would know it's a Marni, no need to scream name brand on the side. I'm more interested in having a bag that I love that also happens to be functional.

Is a bag an integral part of your style?
Absolutely. It can make or break your look. In the evenings, I switch to something much smaller but still carry the bare essentials. I really like purses!

What's your night purse like?
What is most important to me is that it has a long strap. You don't want to be the lady with the big ol' bag on your shoulder hitting people at an event. One hand for my drink, one hand to shake, and I must have my purse low and out of the way.

Sounds like many a years of socializing. Can we see what's inside?

• Apple laptop
• White notepad
• Day planner/address book
• Comme des Garçons wallet
• iPhone
• Checkbook
• Pilot G-2 pen
• Ibuprofen
• Arnica

Do you get a lot of headaches?
I have a bum shoulder. Some days I take the hippie cure and other times I go to full on western medicine.

G. Smith
I always have to have something to read!

• Papermate mechanical pencil
• Set of keys
• Tape measure
• Altoids
• 3 pairs of Apple headphones
• One grey ankle sock

I'm hoping that is your sock?
Yes! It is my sock!

• Bobby pin
• 1 ear plug
• 3 paper clips
• Prescription sunglasses
• Native american styled keychain

My new friend Shirley made that for me. I'm pretty sure it could be used as a roach clip.

• Scraps of paper
• Bunch of change
• Metal business card case
• iKlear single travel cloth
• Pink makeup bag
• Nars powder
• 3 Sephora lipsticks
• New Yorker magazine

Oh, you fancy, huh?
I always have to have something to read absolutely at all times! What if I get stranded? I'm actually totally serious. What if something bad were to happen to me? I get paranoid about my car breaking down and not having anything to read.

What color lipsticks are in there?
Red, 3 shades. It's a must to always have a good red lipstick on hand.

Do you change your purse everyday?
I change purses a lot. I have to travel light and have what I need for my day. Too many things can be overwhelming. Sometimes I have way more random things in here but you caught me on a good day.

Thanks for your time. Let's go eat fish n' chips.

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Jeans Sandal Boots??!!

Kelly O — Thu, 21 Mar 2013 13:06:00 -0700

Sweet jumpin' Jesus! Look at what Danielle, in Haifa, Israel is making and selling on Etsy. Don't you want a pair? Admit it, you kinda do! Oh, and where to wear them? My mind is melting. This pair is even in my size.

www.etsy.com/listing/119792580/jeans-sandal-boots-handmade-size-us-10

H/t to Sivart Rettir!

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What You're Not Wearing: Penumbra Beer Bash Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 12:40:51 -0700

This feather:

These pants:

This beanie:

This necklace:

This bow tie:

This cropped sweater:

These pink shoes:

This blouse:

This cheetah:

These flowers:

This green:

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Purse Thursdayz: Kaleidoscope Vision

Radjaw — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 21:30:09 -0700

Sophia, 26. Mackenzie, 27. Ria, 27. 5:00pm, Kaleidoscope Vision.

This week I figured to give you a good ol' fashioned 3-for-1 special. The ladies of Kaleidoscope Vision were gracious enough to open up their purses for me. These three own KV on Capitol Hill and recently celebrated their one-year anniversary. KV is a lifestyle boutique filled with gorgeous, hand-picked vintage clothes, shoes, and miscellaneous art items throughout. With a forthcoming online shop, these ladies also cater to the community by putting on private events and workshops that include quilting, anointing oils, and styling. These ladies ARE fashion and I have to know what's inside.

So, can I take a look inside your purses?
Mackenzie: Sure!
Ria: No. Mine is boring and I'm a mom.
Sophia: No. Mine is all garbage and broken cigarettes.
Let's start with Mackenzie... you other two don't have to unless you really want to. What kind of purse is this?
It's a 1960s? 1970s? It's a vintage horse hair purse that I got like two weeks ago. So far, it's been my everyday purse.

"Everybody wants to know what's in a KV girl's purse!"

• Sugar Rose tinted lip treatment
• Pink monthly moleskin calendar
• Leather coin purse
• Baume Genereux L'art Du Soin

OK? I don't even understand any of that but it sounds fancy.
It's hand lotion. Actually it's diptyque.

• iPhone 5 with leopard case
• 90s hoops from Goodwill
• White headphones
• Hi-Chew mango flavored candies
• Sharpie pen

That is the smallest Sharpie I've seen.
It's for my eyebrows, well better for eyeliner.

• Comair comb
• $5 bill
• Western Beauty supply receipt
• Tom Ford lipstick in narcotic rouge
• Milagros silver pendant

Are there ever narcotics in your purse?
Not these days, I am too old for that!

And this?
That's a milagros. It's a miracle charm. It was the only thing I transferred from my old purse to this purse. I was hoping that it would bring me luck. Luck in love anyways, and I need it. I need it.
Sophia? Can we see what's in your tote?
M: C'mon! Everybody wants to know what's in a KV girl's purse!
S: Okay okay, but I am not going to dump it out because tobacco will literally go everywhere. But it is from a local designer and I can show my love for them.

• Brown American Apparel beanie
• Nars makeup
• Giant wooden bracelet
• Comme des Garçons wallet
• Laura Mercier moisturizer
• Laura Mercier mascara

You gals have so much designer French shit I've never even heard of. So fancy!
M: I don't think designer mascara is even that good.
S: We like nice things.

"Mine is all garbage and broken cigarettes."

• Advil 2-pack
• KV scented oil
• Seven $1 bills
• Miniature yellow lighter
• Bvlgari jasmine noir perfuse
• Parliament Lights
• 2 pairs of vintage sunglasses

Anything else in there?
S: Everything is just so dirty, but whatever that's just the kind of gal I am.
Ria? How about yours? Ready to share?
R: Are your ready for six purses within a purse? Are you ready for lipstick town?!?
I am. What kind of purse is it?
R: It's a black leather '90s backpack that Mackenzie actually gave me because I lost mine.

• Green laptop case
• Leather bag (handmade by Ria)
• Blue beanie from the gas station
• Pink beanie for her daughter
• Egyptian 1950s Ray Bans
• Multi-tool
• $100 bill designed tissue packs

Those are sweet!
R: I secretly stole those from our store. Shhhh!

• Blueberry gum
• Micron pen #02
• Lait Frais lotion
• Keys
• Money clip shaped like a big paper clip
• Perfume bottle
• Lipstick
• YSL lipstick
• Nars lipstick

"Are your ready for six purses within a purse?"

Man, I was hoping for some dirt besides actual dirt.
R: Oh look! I did have perfume in there after all. Ya know, this is really just a good chance for me clean out my purse and see what shit is actually in there.
M: There is no dirt.
S: No dirt, sorry!
M: Maybe five years ago but we are not gonna talk about those days. We are small business owners now!
R: I'm a mom! And I'm 47!

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What You're Not Wearing: Pike Place Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 11 Mar 2013 11:57:42 -0700

These feathers:

This purse:

This denim vest:

These waders:

This guitar:

This elephant:

These reflections:

These fringed boots:

This pleated skirt:

This clown nose:

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Purse Thursdayz: Melina

Radjaw — Thu, 07 Mar 2013 11:35:51 -0800

Mary Kalhor
Melina, 28. Pleather bag. 11:20pm. Via Tribunali.

I interviewed Melina and her purse a while back and I was so completely moved by my time with her purse that it had to be shared with you. Melina is a good friend of my lady and cracks me up whenever I see her. She is currently back in school and working on some new business endeavors that I cannot discuss. She is an avid traveller that loves froyo almost as much as I do. I mean who doesn't love froyo? Onto the purse!

Where did you get the purse?
It's from an H & M in Zurich, Switzerland.
Is this your favorite purse?
It is my everyday, shove all my shit in there, purse.
This is beautiful! What is that? Velvet??
Pleather.
Oh. Okay, well what is in this thing?!

• N Green bus transfer with gum on it
• Feather hair extension thingy
• 20 Francs (20 Francs is like 20 dollars)
• Headphones with gum stuck to the cords
• Earrings, gum coated
• Lip gloss, covered in gum
• $5 in five, single dollar bills
• Set of keys with Prince Harry keychain

Swoon!!
Everything is coated in bubble gum because they are yet to invent gum that doesn't stick to other shit. It's ridiculous!

• Coconut bar wrapper
• Junk
• Paper
• Random coins that cannot be determined due to the amount of gum on each piece

"Everything is coated in bubble gum because they are yet to invent gum that doesn't stick to other shit. It's ridiculous!"

My change is not really money anymore. It's gum.
It's anything but money. Anything left in there?
[Pulls out a piece of paper.] Oh my god! This is a secret letter. A secret hate letter to my ex-coworker who got fired a while ago. She's a bitch and I never gave it to her. [Pulls out another stack of papers.] This is my dissertation paper.
What's your dissertation about?
Science and shit. It's still a work in progress. [Yet another piece of paper.] This is another secret hate letter I wrote to my ex-coworker that I never gave to her.
Is that everything?
Yup! That looks like all of it.

(I then reach my hand inside the purse to check. The walls are insulated with what feels like old gum. Everything feels like soft rubber white pencil erasers. It's like petting a a dried up whale. My arm is communicating with me to get the hell out of there.)
That's enough of that. Thanks for your time, Melina!

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What You're Not Wearing: Comicon Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 04 Mar 2013 12:22:42 -0800

This dress:

This FBI badge:

These masks:

This top hat:

This Pikachu hat:

These hedgehog spines:

These overalls:

This vest:

This cape:

This Mass Effect M8 Avenger Assault Rifle:

These tights:

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Purse Thursdayz: Sharlese

Radjaw — Thu, 28 Feb 2013 15:39:30 -0800

Sharlese Sharlese, 34. Big leather carryall. 10:32pm. Barboza

Sharlese was strutting her sassy self throughout town last night. She left work late, enjoyed a live show with drinks and friends, then devoured a slice of pizza before calling it a night. Homegirl has been working for KEXP for years as an on-air personality, and kills it on her own show, Audioasis. She was having a grand ol' time at the Master Musicians of Bukkake show and wondered why she had such a big bag with her.

Where did you get the purse?
Red Light, about a year ago. No a year and a half. No! Two years ago.
What kind of purse it?
I don't fucking know... a leather one?
It's kinda big for a night out.
I use this bag when I'm in need of a travel-size bag, but one I can take to the club. You never know what will happen!
What brings you to the Master Musicians of Bukkake show?
I just love these guys. It's just so good isn't it?
I liked the openers, MTNS, they were good. Very fucking loud, but good.
Yeah they are cool, but I like these guys better.
Would you consider yourself a master of bukkake?
Most definitely. We all have our own means of marking our territory. Musically speaking, it's basically just decorating things with your friends.
OK, enough jibber jabber, what's in there?
Be warned. I have some problems in here.

• 6 pack multi-colored pens
• W-9 tax form
• Skull Candy brown headphones
• Swedish Fish
• Pair of black leather gloves
• Zebra wallet
• USB
• White lighter
• Blue lighter

Two lighters?
Sometimes you need two!! What if I'm digging through this purse and I can't find one?

• $.63 in change
• Lip gloss
• Lotion
• Keys
• Moisture lotion
• Fisherman's Cough Suppressant
• Pile of cough drops

"I have some problems in here."

What happened?
This is a major problem I was telling you about. These damn cough drops were open and spilled all over the inside of my bag. At least you're giving me a reason to clean out this damn thing.

• Emergen-C packet
• Altoids container filled with goodies
• Dollar bill
• Garbage
• Crumpled paper
• Bus transfer
• Gold iPod
• Black iPod touch

Two iPods?
A girl can never have enough music. Especially with what I do, I always need music in my life.

Damn.. I actually thought your purse was going to be a lot juicier. Your problems are meh.
I'm sorry. Kinda boring huh? No, but it has been with me through thick and thin. This thing has been through some shit with me, I can tell you that.

Does your purse smoke weed?
Luckily, no. It's just a good friend who holds my pot cookies.

Too bad you don't have any with you now.
Stupid purse.

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What You're Not Wearing: Party Animals Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 25 Feb 2013 12:08:03 -0800

This snake:

This feather:

This Chairy costume:

This mouse:

This Cub Scout shirt:

These antlers:

These zebras:

This sweater:

This collar:

These paws:

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Purse Thursdayz: Megan

Radjaw — Thu, 21 Feb 2013 14:46:00 -0800

Megan is the marketing coordinator at Neumos and loves where she works. She is an early-morning go-getter that fully embraces the music scene. I ran into her at the Mercury for a Nightmare Fortress show and she was as happy as can be. The ferocious lights provided by the band illuminated her bag and I had to know what was inside such a tiny accessory. Her nose ring never butted in to the conversation.

Megan, 22. Small Coach purse. 12:53am. The Mercury.

Where did you get the purse?
I bought it.
What kind of purse it?
It's Coach.
Bootleg?
No. Not at all, it's real Coach.
Open it for me.
There's not much. I took all the shit out of my earlier bag and just brought this little thing.
What's in it?

• White iPhone 5
• Paystub
• Note for Jason L.
• Elf the musical ticket

I loved the musical. It was so fucking good, almost as good as the movie.
Really? Jesus.

"My purse isn't goth enough for this show."

• Coach tag
• Set of keys attached to a UW Husky lanyard
• Chapstick with ripped off label
• Lip gloss
• Lipstick

So having good lips is important to you?
Well…
What's in this pocket of the purse?
You don't need to know! This is going to be in the Stranger, I cannot tell you that.
Don't worry, it's only the Weekly, nobody reads that.
That's true.

• $80 cash
• Oddfellows receipt
• BOA receipt
• Bobby pins
• Coin purse

Is this your everyday purse?
It's my going out bag. I would have so much more, you have no idea.
What didn't you bring to the club?
I usually always carry gloves and extra Chapstick. And sometimes I have a big umbrella stuffed into it.
Too bad you don't have that purse with you tonight.
I know. I'm sorry. My purse isn't goth enough for this show.
Do you have any backup nose rings in there? What if a mosh pit breaks out and rips one from your face? Wouldn't your purse have your back and have extra rings to plug into your nostril?
No! But, I wish I did! Shit, I will from now on.
What did you think of the show?
It was cool.
Too many glow sticks for me.

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What You're Not Wearing: Dead Celebrity Edition!!

Timothy Rysdyke — Mon, 18 Feb 2013 12:30:25 -0800

This stingray tail:

This dress:

This paint pallet:

These dad jeans:

These necklaces:

This mole:

These sunglasses:

This microphone:

This Lamb Chop:

This 'stash:

These butterflies:

This blood:

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Purse Thursdayz: Sarah

Radjaw — Thu, 14 Feb 2013 15:26:35 -0800

Welcome to Purse Thursdayz! Every week, I'll be looking into the purses, bags, and satchels of some of Seattle's finest women—seeing exactly what they are carrying around all day. Catching purses in their natural environment is very important, so these ladies do not know they are going to be interviewed. Shall we?

After a most delicious lunch at Salumi with a good friend, I found myself in Lower Queen Anne and decided to bum rush Sarah's office immediately upon walking past it. Sarah is the Director of Development and Community Relations at SAMA by day and an avid Cam'ron supporter by night. She is co-founder of Cafe Society, an ex-DJ that likes making her own earrings, and is one half of Christmas rap duo Holigang. After she finished a taste test for the new Lays' potato chip, she gladly started to pull things out of her bag.

Sarah, 38. Yellow leather tote. 3:30pm. Office building.

Where did you get the purse?
My mom got it at a fake market in Shanghai. She decided it wasn't good for carrying her laptop and had too many pockets. She gave it to me in November after she kept losing things inside of it. It happens.
What kind of purse is it?
By looking at the imprinted tree logo on the inside I can tell that it is 100% Mulberry knock-off.
Is this your everyday go to purse?
I use it everyday, but mainly just for work. This thing is way too big to take out at night.
It looks pretty big for a night out on the town.
It has huge pockets!! I think I mainly use it for work because I can use it for grocery shopping after. Don't nobody want to be paying for paper bags these days.
Can we take a look inside?
Sure!

• Loaf of Country Buttermilk bread
• Trader Joe's peanut butter
• Keys
• Mom's car keys
• Red Louis Vuitton wallet

Is that real Louis?
No! It's also a knock-off. Another gift from Shanghai given to me as a part of an employee incentive. Oh shit, I can hear my friends now, "I always knew you were bootleg, Sarah. This just confirms it!"

• Two iPhone wall chargers
• Three tampons

Are those Mardi Gras tampons? The packaging is so festively colored.
It's funny you say that! They come in this sleek black box and are all pinks and purples. My boyfriend always makes fun of me saying these are my clubbin' tampons.

"Are those Mardi Gras tampons?"

• Zinc tablet
• Necklace*
• Stack of disheveled papers

What are all these papers?
Well, this is some old grocery lists and these are just a bunch of printed out emails.
You print out your emails?
Sometimes you have to! These are for some guest list thing and then there are some for this pending lawsuit I am dealing with.
Can I ask more about that?
No.

• Two single dollar bills
• AT&T protection plan pamphlet
• Baby Lips lip balm

That's the new heat right there. All the women have that these days, and they have different colors if you want it. I just like the natural one.

• Two blue push pins
• Clear nail polish
• Target coupons
• Two gold-plated buttons

Damn, I wonder what those buttons are for… Wait! Oh shit! They are for the jacket I am wearing today. See? Here and here, I need to put these back on. If only I can find one more, I'd be set.
Maybe you should check your other purses. Is there anything else in there?

• Burt's Bees beeswax lip balm
• Plastic organic food bag

Well, you don't really need that because of your grocery bag purse.
It's true! I think I grabbed it for a lot of vegetables but then decided to just grab one or something and shoved that into my purse.

• Gap receipt
• Loose change
• Hair scrunchie
• Tweezers

Fuck, I lost those too! And why do I even have a scrunchie? I have had short hair for a while now.
What's that middle part of the purse?
It's just in different sections. Left side, right side, and then this middle part.
It looks like it comes out. Is that a purse inside your purse?
Yea, Crazy! You can take the inside out and use it as a shoulder bag, and then just have the outside part be a big tote bag.
So you have been carrying a purse around inside your purse...
Don't tell my mom about this, cause then she will know she could have fit her laptop in there!
Well, now you have your grocery tote bag and your clubbin' purse at the same time. You are good to go.
It's true, but damn I must really be a hoarder. I hate seeing things go to waste and this purse has only been helping me. I don't fucking get it. I live across the street from my office, why am I carrying this crap back and forth each day?
I don't know, Sarah. I carry a wallet.

*Sarah said that if anyone wanted this necklace, let her know and they can have it.

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The Only 2013 Grammys Synopsis You Need!

Bree McKenna — Thu, 14 Feb 2013 12:16:29 -0800

By the time the actual Grammys rolled around, I felt a little partied out from all the weird stuff happening that weekend (also, the Odd Future crew had been making a rowdy party music video in a room on our hotel floor until really late). The whole thing starts early, and it felt sillly getting sequined-up in the early afternoon.

The Grammys are held in the Staples Center, which feels like any sporting event stadium, except it's crawling with people in black-tie dress code standing next to corporate hamburger spots and nacho stands. But those places are closed and no actual food is available during the (REALLY, REALLY LONG) show and apparently people passing out is not all that uncommon. When I sat down in my plastic stadium chair, it crossed my mind that the invention of the clutch purse is a cruel joke... you can barely fit a phone in them! Worthless!

Important notes from the 2013 Grammys:

*Taylor Swift opened up the show with an elaborate all-white nightmare production of "We Are Never Getting Back Together," complete with dancing clowns. Meanwhile, her ex John Mayer was dressed like a game-show host in the audience with his new girlfriend Katy Perry.

*Katy Perry consoled those who didn't take home the best new artist award by saying, "Don't feel bad if you didn't win. I never won this and I have my own eyelash line. Take that, Bon Iver."

*There were 20 performances this year—a record number. I was kind of bummed the speeches didn't run longer though, I kind of like babblers.

*Boring tribute medleys happened every five minutes.

* Jack White brought both his female and male band for two songs and completely slayed. His losing album of the year to Mumford and Sons made me so angry that I started yelling at the guy next me like a crazy sports dude, "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? THIS IS TOTAL FUCKING BULLSHIT!" (But seriously, Mumford?! Clean out your ears, Academy.)

*During commercial breaks, everyone on stage kept commenting on what a great job the host LL Cool J was doing in this really paternal way, as if he were a small child we were supposed to be cheering on during a play.

*There were zero obligatory cheers when Chris Brown's nomination was listed off.

*The best new artist award went to the band Fun. who ruin spin class for me several times a month.

*Goyte won album of the year, and still looks like Gary from Partman Parthorse.

*The Black Keys (perhaps most famous in Seattle for their alleged TP-ing of Stranger writer Derek Erdman's house) partnered up for a performance with Dr. John and the Preservation Hall Jazz Band.

*Justin Bieber was rumored to have been conspicuously absent because he felt sad about not being nominated.

*Between the new dress code that basically only targets women from dressing too slutty, and Chris Brown being honored with performance spots last year, I'm hoping the 2014 Grammys don't include another surprise anti-feminist diss.

*All in all, every performance was a lot like watching the film Con Air... so much crazy action that you almost start get bored when the 15th climax point rolls around. It's the musical equivalent to an amazing motorcycle chase after a plane crash.

Beautiful Adele.

After-parties were aplenty after LL Cool J dismissed us; champagne flowed freely, the night raged on until large grown men were being carried out of hotel parties and thrown into cabs. I met a sweet music-industry fellow a while ago who said that he might be able to get me tickets to that unbelievable Mark McGrath and Friends Cruise. When I ran into him later that night, I faced the inevitable loud uttering of "HEY BREE, I THINK THAT I CAN STILL GET YOU TICKETS TO THAT SUGAR RAY CRUISE THAT YOU WANTED TO GO TO."

Later on, former Neumos sound guy Evan Lasure and Lance from the Seattle band Cumulus were spotted in an after-party cabana next to Prince, and Jay-Z told my girlfriend she looked "very, very nice," and I've been hearing abut it several times a day ever since.

I definitely found myself arguing on the phone with Virgin Airline's customer service the next day trying to justify reasons on why I had missed my flight. This concludes my tale of Grammy weirdness. THE END.

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