To those who either don't know or have forgotten how to talk to pregnant women (and there appear to be a fuckload of you): Why is it that when you ask me how my pregnancy is going, and I don't respond entirely positively, you say, "Just wait!" in order to warn me of the horrors to come—as if I am not terrified of these horrors at all times already? Are you even a human? And Part B: When you feel the need to say either "You're so big!" or "You're so small!" I am going to respond by applying loaded adjectives to your body, so just be ready.

—Anonymous