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Friday, April 13, 2007

Best Song Ever (This Week): “Don’t Touch My Bikini” by the Halo Benders

posted by on April 13 at 12:40 PM

Listen to the song here!

“Don’t Touch My Bikini” was one of many songs in the mid-’90s that seemed to feature white men talking fast in monotone. Off the album God Don’t Make No Junk, the song features Calvin Johnson saying lyrics like “Gettin’ cranky/Need a spanky/Got no heater/Extra blankie” while Doug Martsch picks out random words and sings backup. They occasionally match up, giving those lyrics extra weight (like on “Vegans!/That’s not funny”). It was also released as a single, which is very hard to find (and yes, I do own it).

The song is happy and catchy, and often features a “boinnng!” sound, especially during the chorus. Other random sound effects are littered about. The song is great for dancing around your living room and being silly to, but since Doug Martsch is one of the best and most inventive guitarists of the past 20 years, the song is also extremely technical and full of strange, catchy lines.

Calvin Johnson is known for being weird, and during this time, Martsch was known for being heartbroken. They came together to have fun, and they achieved it, making this the BEST SONG EVER (This week)!

BONUS MATERIAL! Whatevs provided this link a few days ago, but if you want to see just how weird Calvin Johnson is, (and check out a NEW HALO BENDERS SONG!), go see this video.

(Stream of “Don’t Touch My Bikini” was thoughtfully allowed by K Recs.)

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That song is completely rad. However, I remember when it came out my reaction was more, "what the fuck?" and I turned that shit off. For its time it was definitely a little too arty for the grungers and punks of the day.

Posted by Benji | April 13, 2007 1:21 PM

By the time I discovered the Halo Benders I was totally burnt out on punk (which for me had mostly meant Rancid, Green Day, and a host of hardcore bands that I saw live but didn't ever listen to that much). It was just the right transition into literally indie music that sonically wasn't quite punk. The whole indie/punk Doug/Calvin dynamic makes Halo Benders totally unique and enduring for me. Also, Calvin and Doug on the same stage is a wonder to behold.

Posted by Eric Grandy | April 13, 2007 1:42 PM

johnson and marsch are the vocal equivalent of abbot and costello, one sorta thin reedy schoolboy and the other a big fat buffoon (im talking about their voices, not their appearances). as quirky and fun as their early stuff is, i think "the rebels not in" is really their classic, a bit more sophisticated and serious but still totally weird and unique.

that video is great. looks like boise was going berserk for that show. heres hoping the halo benders make it to seattle.

Posted by jz | April 13, 2007 2:19 PM

That song has been floating around my computer/iPod for a little while now, but I'm pretty sure I got it from a Paste sampler a year or so ago, so I didn't realize it was a mid-90's thing. Seems like a bit of a novelty song, but it is fun.

Posted by HaloBent | April 13, 2007 4:51 PM

this was my favorite song in 8th grade.

Posted by alithea | April 16, 2007 11:11 AM

Are the Halo Benders playing again? Love that band, I hope so.

Posted by bob | April 18, 2007 2:51 AM

and up jumped the swagman and sprang into the billabong while watching how his penis patches got wet at

Posted by penis patches | April 30, 2007 12:05 PM

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