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Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Clan, In Da Front

posted by on September 4 at 16:40 PM

Yo, I feel like straight crap. Bumbershoot is all I’ve done for the last 3 days, with it’s shitty-bomb food, smuggled Old Crow, and desperation 4-dollar Miller Lights; my guts are pissed right now. I haven’t kicked it at the Shoot like that since high school- except instead of stamp-licking and fence-jumping, it was my lanyard on which hung a fresh-to-death BumberBoard pass. Baller.

Among many other things, I danced, slammed, and heckled at the Fergie show(thus I ended up having a great time at her super-crappy show- did i achieve irony?), I lumpenly sat hungover as hell in the VIP above the Esurance stage like a casualty of some alcoholic war, and i caught John Legend flipping his "PDA" over the stone bboy jam "Rock Creek Park"- a fact that my dad will love to hear. I also was blessed to rock onstage with the Blue Scholars and a GRIP of 206 heads for an all-star version of "North By Northwest" that got the whole Fisher Green jumping. There was over a dozen of us up there ripping 8 bars apiece more or less for a few thousand enthusiastic fans, and it was yet another moment where we all felt like, YES- our little scene is getting it's shit together. Moments like the Shocked On The Buzz show from last year or the Sportn' Life anniversary last month, where all parties involved walk away with an even deeper sense of community and awe at how far things seem to have come in the past few years. Love to the Scholars for making that shit happen.I thought it was the biggest possible highlight of my time at Bumbershoot 2007.

Until last night. Goddammit, I got front and center for Lupe Fiasco and Wu-Tang Clan. And stayed there. And it was fucking worth it. D.Black's DJ, Nphared, fast-rising MC Grynch and I ended up coated in about 100 different types of white people sweat, crushed pummelled and near-trampled for hours- and that was after we were made to sit like preschoolers, on the ground, for what seemed like ages.

Lupe was awesome and blindingly white in his designer outfit- girls by me yelled "YOUR FUCKIN' HOT!" and a dude next to me screamed "I LIKE YOUR CLOTHES!"; at one point Lupe's stylist came out to fix the cuffs on his expensive-looking white pants. If he wasn't such a dope MC I wouldn't be able to stomach how caught up on himself he seemed from 15 feet away- since he doesn't drink or smoke, I'd have to say he was positively drunk with swagger, blinking at the crowd, weaving ecstatically to the music or doing that mock conductor thing that happens at every beat battle; such as the awesome Red Bull Big Tunes at the War Room last Friday night that started off the 206 head's Labor Day weekend- and congrats to Sabzi for earning top honors. Anyway, Lupe's choreography game was mean- he and his hypeman glided, spun, and leaped all over that stage, and seemed cool as a fan doing it. I love Lupe Fiasco because he brings to the forefront that you don't have to be a "mack, pimp, or mobster"- you can be a regular cat and still be cool as a motherfucker doing it. No wonder his next record is called The Cool. The only weak spot in his set was for me, his verse from the "Eraser"-sampling "Us Placers" by CRS(Child Rebel Soldiers), Fiasco's much-hyped soopergroup with Kanye and Pharrell Williams. Lupe wasn't keeping up with his recorded vocals-ugh- and as much as I love Thom Yorke, that track doesn't work as a beat- it lacks a certain propulsion and fails to make anyone "make that face', as LL once put it. But other than that, dude murdered it (the pimply faced Zack Morris-looking Lupe-hater that was in our vicinity can just suck it easy).

J. Moore, The Mayor of Seattle Hiphop, came out to introduce the Wu, as he did Lupe- but the mic faltered on him, so he returned to the wings. It's almost for the best- as there could be no better intro than "Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuttin' to Fuck With". Right off the bat, the absence of Ghost and The Genius was glaring, but the Clan in attendance(along with Meth's protege Streetlife) destroyed shit. Even if you've never seen the whole Clan- as i have not- you probably know what to expect, from The Show, from DVDs, from legend itself: ODB tribute with singalong(check), Method Man's crowd-surfing antics(double check). Only thing is, it was all as thrilling as if it hadn't already passed into public record what the Wu does onstage. I once read in the Wu-Tang Manual that they hardly ever plan out sets- and perhaps that's true- but seeing as this was the last show of their tour, as they reminded us several times, they had their thing-thing trump tight. One moment, seemingly a mess, members all over the stage- then they'd suddenly lock into a powerful offensive line at the foot of the stage, fists pumping in unison, smiling at the stadiumful of fans chanting their hook- then the line would break and, say, Raekwon and U-God would stride out into center stage, seamlessly seguing into "It's Yourz". Controlled chaos, the true calling card of the Wu-Tang Clan.

The crowd in front actually got increasingly hyper as the show went on, a rare feat for a hiphop show. Lupe Fiasco was every bit the Wu-acolyte himself on the side of the stage, holding his W aloft or getting buck to "M.E.T.H.O.D. MAN". Everyone present rejoiced in the spectacle before us, and while increasingly energetic and boisterous, heads in front chilled out a bit. Clouds of weed smoke drifted through from all directions. Kids fell down and we helped em up. People fainted, and we surfed em to the barrier. The pummelling pressure of the crowd eased, as the crowd finally got what it so earnestly, desperately, oftimes painfully awkwardly wanted. Can I get a SUUUUUUUUUUUUU?

And just as the Wu have done in real life, they promised another album, told us they loved us, then slowly, randomly scattered to the four winds. It actually took damn near 20-odd minutes for the dismount, as Method threw random articles of clothing into the crowd, and StreetLife repeated where to find them over and over and over: Hotel 1000. Hotel 1000. Hotel 1000. "Come snap your pictures and alla dat", Raekwon chimed in from the wings, "all ladies 21 & over, if you ain't gotta work tomorrow, come on thru." "Hotel 1000", Streetlife continued, "24-hour room service, 24-hour open bar. Just don't touch the minibar."

As we drove away from Seattle Center in the rain, we imagined that RZA's hilarious onstage tai-chi kept the elements at bay- and that the cracks of lightning illuminating the sky came from Hotel 1000, as yet another groupie was sacrificed to the almighty Wu-Pantheon. Protect Ya Neck.

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we need the groupie report!

Posted by KELLY O | September 4, 2007 5:08 PM

fuckin legendary.

Posted by jz | September 4, 2007 5:13 PM

The intro to M-E-T-H-O-D MAN is fuckin legendary-

torture motherfucker what?
Torture nigga what?
I'll fuckin
I'll fuckin tie you to a fuckin bedpost
with your ass cheeks spread out and shit
Put a hanger on a fuckin stove and let that shit sit there
for like a half hour
Take it off and stick it in your ass slow like

Yeah, I'll fuckin
Yeah I'll fuckin lay your nuts on a fuckin dresser
Just your nuts layin on a fuckin dresser
And bang them shits with a spiked fuckin bat
Whassup? BLAOWWW!!

I'll fuckin
I'll fuckin pull your fuckin tongue out your fuckin mouth
and stab the shit with a rusty screwdriver, BLAOWW!!
I'll fuckin

I'll fuckin
I'll fuckin hang you by your fuckin dick
off a fuckin twelve sto-story building out this motherfucker

I'll fuckin
I'll fuckin
sew your asshole closed, and keep feedin you
and feedin you, and feedin you, and feedin you

Give a holla out to Vanessa Coleman, Letalvis "Rome" Cobbins, Lemaricus Devall "Slim" Davidson, and George Geovonni "Detroit" Thomas. They livin the Wu Tang message. Check it.

When police went to the address on Tuesday, January 9, they found the home unoccupied and Channon Christian's body in a trash can in the kitchen. Christian had been strangled to death. According to the grand jury presentment, Christian had also been raped vaginally, orally, and anally. One of the suspects, Vanessa Coleman, later told police that "she witnessed Christian's mouth being cleaned with a bottle of some type of cleaner," in an attempt to remove DNA evidence. Coleman also said that she had seen "clothes that were stained with blood and smelled of gas being put in the washing machine at the house." Christopher Newsom was shot three times, "his body wrapped in a blanket, set afire and dumped alongside nearby railroad tracks." He had also been anally raped.

Posted by Make em pay | September 4, 2007 5:56 PM

stay classy, Seattle!

Posted by lar | September 4, 2007 11:35 PM

#3 - don't be an asshole

Posted by KELLY O | September 5, 2007 11:52 AM

ghost was there he didnt do much but smoke blunts he was wearing black shorts with red shocks pulled up

Posted by winston | September 5, 2007 1:12 PM

Winston, I thought that at first too, but upon closer inspection- it was Streetlife.

Posted by lar | September 5, 2007 1:53 PM

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